Saturday, April 23, 2016

Saturday-12:15pm

Good Afternoon!  :)
The Canadian geese have waddled past in the grass...
...and right down the sidewalk. 
They aren't frightened away by joggers or small dogs on leashes, which absolutely cracks me up.   
They kind of calmly dare anybody to come any closer.  Size is a factor in the wild...and temperament.  Geese can be nasty when pushed--LOL!  So they wander quite regally past depending on reputation of their species, I guess.  ;)
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I took this picture last week.  The grass on my side of the sidewalk was getting quite green (probably with the added assistance of rabbit and grouse fertilizer) but across the way was brown as can be. 
Oh!  Caught Karma drinking water--just to bug her.  Do you see that look?!  I have rarely taken pictures of her eating--LOL! 
The sweet little pair of grouse were by another day. 
Sorry for the glare on the glass.  
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We have had a few days where I could open the patio door wide... 
...and Miss Karma feels like she is outside. 
Well, almost. 
We've also had days where it was too chilly to even crack the door open for more than a few minutes for Karma to do her morning air sniffing. 
But this morning!  
(Notice how green the grass is!) 
Gorgeous, already 60 degrees, and windy.
Karma watches for twigs, leaves, dried grass... 
..anything to whip past across the cement...
...so she can race back and forth (believe it or not she doesn't always lay around--LOL!) along the patio door.  She must think they are small critters or bugs or toys--something exciting.  The real spooky thrill for her, though, is when an empty plastic bag, freed from a dumpster somewhere, gets caught up in the whirlwind vortex outside our door.  Can keep her busy for hours--LOL!
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Well, there were no thunderstorms.  We've had a lot of drizzly rain, though, that the grass has adored.  They say possible thunderstorms again later today, but I won't hold my breath.  They seem to pass around us for some reason.  I'm still waiting for my first good storm.  Do love them!  :)
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I was so sick that I didn't even take many pictures for weeks.  With birthday money I did buy a few things I didn't really need, as a person should, right?  See the white paint splattered paper tray?  It is lightweight and can hold a ream of paper, I guess--but I got it to hold all my letters in progress, current pens, and the clips I use to help keep various bookcards and tablets together (bum arm assistance).
Plus I got a set of Brusho crystalized watercolors and a set of Color Burst powdered watercolors.  After Leah and I finish up with our current projects the next thing is to play with these and a masking fluid resist. 
Leah wanted to switch from Monday to Thursday for Craft Night this week, but had forgotten her youngest sister, Ariel, was coming up for a visit.  So we will meet again on this coming Monday night--which by this time is another Craft Night here in the community room.  So Leah will come early and we will wheel down our stuff again.  :)  Wonder if anyone else will bring something to work on?
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There was an impromptu walk-through of every unit this past Monday morning.  When I woke up at 9am I saw a piece of paper under the door that said the walk-throughs of all the units would start at 9:30am!  I scrambled to shower and throw some clothes on.  Turned out--people had been complaining about residents smoking in their apartments and he did this whole thing without much warning so that he could literally walk through and smell for cigarette smoke--LOL!  
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Now I haven't smoked since 1989, but I have wondered ever since I moved here to this "Smoke Free" building why in the world they would allow smokers to move here in the first place??  They gathered last fall in lawn chairs out in somebody's garage--about half a dozen of them.  When it's cold out they stand right next to the door at the entrance--which is six months of the year up here.  I wouldn't doubt they might smoke on their balconies.  But why would you allow them to move in when they can be evicted for smoking in their apartments?  Makes no sense at all.
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When I was a smoker--and you know I am one to follow rules and could never lie about it if asked--I don't think there's any way I wouldn't have grabbed a smoke in my own apartment.  Especially when it's 20 below outside and windy as hell...or if I woke up at 2am and couldn't get back to sleep and felt too miserable to get dressed.  Man!  Am I ever glad I don't smoke anymore!!  For so many reasons.  Imagine how bad my health would be if I was a smoker now?  Well, I could very likely already be dead, for that matter.
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But that is why I would never have moved into a non-smoking building when I was a smoker.  I know myself too well.  I could never have followed the restrictions.  I think these people were just fooling themselves, you know?  So are the owners.  Maybe the owners were afraid of being sued or something, I don't know.  But why??  There are all kinds of other restrictions for living here--age, income, etc.  And they are even planning on making an outdoor smoking spot for them this summer?!
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I can totally empathize, having been a smoker...but why would you even consider moving into a no-smoking building?  That is one of the things after 10 1/2 years of the fire alarm going off when I lived on third floor in West Winds that I was happy about when I was moving here.  A no smoking building!  Well, not really.  Just baffles me.  I thought no smoking meant no smoking??
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Oh well.  Not up to me, eh?
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Okay--I promised to tell you about Give A Girl A Journal.  Maybe you remember the stack of blank journals I purged and had in a box in the garage to give away on freecycle this spring? 
 All the not fountain pen friendly journals I had collected over the years? 
Well, Dagan and Leah have a Canadian friend, Nick, who comes down to visit regularly and he was kind enough to haul them back home with him (and Leah added several she picked up at Target, too) so that they could be mailed to Jamie Ridler in Toronto for way less than it would have cost me from the US to Canada.  [In fact, I couldn't afford it and it broke my heart.  Leah came up with idea of asking Nick who was coming down over Easter!  Many thanks to Nick!!]
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Jamie started up this Give A Girl A Journal program (you can click on the sidebar) and I knew the minute I heard about it I wished I could send her all the journals from my garage.  I started writing when I was about nine in 5th grade.  Having a younger brother and sister I didn't feel I had a safe place to keep a "diary" or journal (really wrote just for myself, anyways) so I wrote pages and pages using school filler paper (college ruled, both sides) and then I would destroy it all.  Growing up--writing and reading were everything to me.
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When I was in high school I started to use spiral notebooks--that I actually kept.  Everybody knew by that time not to mess with any of my papers or pens--off limits or there would be hell to pay.  To this day nobody uses a pen (I have pen cups in several spots) without asking if it's an okay pen to use.  In fact, they usually just ask for a pen and I go get them one--well, often giving them a choice of several options--LOL!  But, I digress.
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Writing, for me, was a way to sort things out, see more clearly, and stay on a good path.  I always felt I wrote and wrote around and around something that was bothering me until I finally understood the deeper true reason I was upset and arrived at a more positive perspective.  Remember those cartoons where there would be an angel on one shoulder and a devil on the other?  Well, that is kind of how I felt when I wrote.  It was a battle on paper--for many, many years.  I would write until the angel won.  (Needless to say, I filled up those notebooks pretty rapidly--lol!)  But writing was my personal salvation.
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In high school I started to write poetry sometimes.  I also took sending notes in class to a whole new level.  I wrote them at home half the time and tried to find new and interesting things to write on--like toilet paper and making little scrolls out of adding machine tape.  (No surprise I love making the bookcards today, eh?)  I always had small spiral notebooks in my purse and loved to go with my mom to the mall and people watch.  I would find a bench and write down character descriptions or just whatever I was thinking about.  
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I wrote through first boyfriend, first lover, being around my boyfriend and his friends who sniffed glue and smoked grass (and they accepted me even though I didn't), the events of the late 60s--Vietnam, assassinations, Kent State, 68 convention, Black Power, Women's Rights...we thought we were going to change the world...and it really felt like the world was falling apart.  I wrote about rape, trying drugs and alcohol for the first time, first job in a pet shop, running away to Canada to join a commune, lovers, feeding & caring for street kids, losing my job and ending up on the street myself for a summer...anything and everything. 
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Well, after a few years I had this whole suitcase filled with spiral notebooks, large and small.  Then, in a terrible turn of events, a nasty ex-roommate gave the suitcase to a schizophrenic (really was--found out later from his priest uncle) ex-boyfriend...and he only read enough to hit upon another lover and made a bonfire of them all in his folks' driveway.   
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It felt like a piece of myself had gone up in smoke.  I didn't write for years.  
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But it turned out to be a good thing in the long run because it freed me from being attached to my own words--to the past, too.  Over the years I have journaled...just for myself.  And every so often I destroy them all.  But I have to write!  I would be lost without that ability to sort things out on paper with my angel and devil sides--LOL!  I need to write!  Even if most of the time my "diary-journal" is very dull and of no interest to anyone but myself.  Just what I did or didn't do or want to do--the weather, the critters, Karma--sometimes what I am watching on Netflix--the place I allow myself to complain sometimes about how crummy I really feel or about whatever I wouldn't want to burden the rest of the world with that day...well, actually the day before.  I write when I wake up.  Quite similar to my blog, come to think of it--ROFL!   
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Anyways, if you would want to know more about the Give A Girl A Journal program just click the link in my sidebar.  I'd appreciate it.  They normally just take donations.  People don't send them journals--LOL!  And if you know of any young girl who might benefit from a journal--just enter her name!  :)
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Did any of you journal or keep a diary of sorts?  Do you still?  Or is your blog your journal?  Do you write letters?  Do you have pen pals?  Do you handwrite anything anymore?  I am curious.  (I know some of you write letters because we write to each other!)  
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Even when I am having terrible days if I am going to do anything at all--I will journal--I will write letters or make lists.  I have discovered this about myself since being chronically ill...the one thing my soul needs to do is write.  If I have one spoon--I will still journal in the morning, work on a letter if I'm able and just eat toast rather than use my spoon cooking.  ;)  Truth!  It comes before arts & crafts or some days even showering.  Pen to paper--something special about that.  It is so personal, more intimate, and to me it's calming and contemplative.  Very different than typing for some reason--even though I love blogs and blogging.  Hand writing keeps me grounded and positive.  I don't know why exactly, but ask me if I care--LOL!
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Anyways, I have to say that I am enjoying blogging even more right now when I am back to blogging when I am having a good day and I am moved to do some sharing!  Whoohoo!  I can't imagine my blogs will ever be short.  Sorry.
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  The sky has clouded over.  Maybe we will get some rain after all?  Karma gave up her patio post and is back to sleeping next to me at the table here in her chair.  That has become her favorite place to be in the new apartment.  She sleeps there at night, too.  But the chair has to be in just the right spot to my left and not tucked underneath the table.  In fact, I can take a picture of her right this minute.
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Gosh, I love my cell phone and dropbox!
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See how the chair is at this odd angle at the end of the table?  Testament to how much I love this cranky old cat that my OCD side puts up with the constant disarray!  It's like living with a picture hanging crooked two inches--LOL! 
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Well, that about it from here.  I hope you are having as beautiful a day as we are--and have a spectacular weekend!!  :) :)
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"We must not allow the clock and the calendar to blind us to the fact that each moment of life is a miracle and mystery." 
H.G. Wells

22 comments:

Anonymous said...

Reading today's post made my heart sing--you sound SO much better!!

DJan said...

Love your pictures and commentary, Rita. It's always so nice to hear that you are writing and doing well, recovering from your illness and moving ahead. I cannot imagine you not writing, so I am happy to hear you're getting plenty of it into your life these days. Sending you lots of hugs, and a purr for Karma. :-)

GrandmaG said...

During junior high I had a diary. Remember the ones with the little lock and key? But I didn't keep it up regularly. I, however, do enjoy the written word. But when I was editor of the high school newspaper I learned editing, which tends to sap creativity. I find it difficult to just let words flow. I'm constantly editing myself :) Glad you're feeling better. Hope you get that storm soon ;)

Far Side of Fifty said...

You are feeling better!! Yes I kept a Diary in High School but kept it in code so no one was much the wiser about my mundane thoughts. I had a nosy Mom and little brother. Since then I journaled on and off before starting the blog and now that is my journal, I might not share everything there but pretty close...some days I struggle with being too negative/bitchy and som times it all comes bubbling out...I know...complicated!
It rained up North and I just walked Chance and it is raining out now so I hope it keeps up as we are really dry. That wind can stop blowing anyday now!
Have a good rest of the weekend! :)

TexWisGirl said...

i began journaling in junior high. kept it up 'til i was in my 30s. then stopped. saved them for years, began reading thru some of them, decided the past wasn't worth reliving and burned them all. glad to be free of them. some pain isn't worth remembering. :)

Bleubeard and Elizabeth said...

Loved seeing Karma in positions other than in front of the window. She DOES eat! And those geese are EVERYWHERE. Seems they find homes wherever anyone will feed them.

My blog is my "diary" of sorts. I try to keep everything positive, regardless how I feel. I don't discuss religion and politics, and try never to talk bad about people. Even if I had a journal that no one saw, it's just not in my nature.

It's nice to see you blogging at least once a week again. I was beginning to worry about you. I hope Tuesday craft night turns out to be enjoyable, too.

My name is Erika. said...

That Karma photo you caught is great. I didn't realize what an attractive cat she is. I also think is it so cool you have these birds just walking by you door. I am guessing it is fairly rural around your home. I also have old journals. But then I found art and now I have art journals. Guess it all the same in its own way. Have a wonderful rest of your weekend. :)

Zue said...

I am glad you are feeling better, in your last post you sounded so poorly. Now you are back to normal it seems. We have Canada geese too, they are near to a small lake near my house and often fly over my allotment (where I grow my vegetables).
We have red-legged partridge which are so cute and look just like your grouse. They inhabit the fields nearby and spill out into gardens.
Have a good week, Rita and don't get sick again!
Sue X

Jenny Woolf said...

I agree about the no smoker apartment. But perhaps some of these smokers just love the place apart from that and couldn't find anything better. that's the only reason I can think of anyhow. It seems very nice that you can look out of the window and see wildlife and enjoy green grass, in that way it might be better than your old place? As for journaling, I have always kept a diary since age 11 but mine went up in flames when I was 15. I have the ones since then.They're just a kind of an outlet I guess. Sometimes I write quite interesting things in them, and on the rare occasions I get into reading them I can be quite fascinated! :D

Neesie said...

I can hear in your writing that you are thankfully feeling better Rita, I'm sure having that wonderful sunlight shining in on you has helped. It certainly looks like it's doing Karma good.
I can understand your need to write. I used to write a diary religiously for years in my teens, but once I got married and had my children that seemed to be put on hold.
Blogging has brought back my love for writing back.
Great photos espcially capturing the Canadian Goose!
Keep safe and well xoxo

Bridget Larsen said...

That was sad to read about the letters going up in smoke, but as you said it might have been kind to release you.
Karma must be such a laugh

Serena Lewis said...

How awesome to see Canada geese walk on by. Their attitude would crack me up too...I think geese, in general, are known for their big attitudes. I hear they make pretty good guard dogs. :)

Karma looks so sweet sitting at the door watching the world outside.

I don't mind mild storms but I don't like the very destructive storms we can get here in our summer months.

WOW! It would be illegal for an apartment manager/owner to do a walk-through on such short notice here. They have to give seven days notice at least for a long term rental which is six months to a years lease agreement....for shorter term rentals, they have to give at least 24 hours notice. I agree, some smokers would ignore the rules for sure so why move into a non-smoking building. Most rental home leases here request that smokers must only smoke outside of the house but how can they monitor that, ya know? Our smoking laws are getting stricter here, specifically around public buildings, outside restaurants, etc. which I see as a good thing.

So good that Nick will be able to mail the journals within Canada for you. Definitely a cheaper option.

What an interesting life you have led, Rita. I don't think you have mentioned about a commune in Canada before...you must tell me more of your experience with that one. I have a box of journals I need to destroy. There must be close to a span of ten years journaling in the box. Like you, they were only written as a way to wade through my emotions and life experiences at different times. Probably not things I'd want others reading after I'm gone. I still have a diary I kept when I was 14 which is fun to read at times.

I wrote morning pages religiously for nearly three years and then kinda broke the habit. In recent times, I feel myself being drawn back to doing the Morning Pages. There is definitely something special about putting pen to paper.

I love Microsoft OneDrive as I have it set up so that any photos I take with my phone are automatically saved to the OneDrive cloud so I can access it straight away from any device. I like Dropbox too but I find myself using OneDrive a lot more. Bradley loves Dropbox.

Great H.G. Wells quote! So true...we often become slaves to time and lose focus of how special the 'now' is.

Enjoy the rest of your weekend...it's 11am on Monday here.

Love and hugs,
Serena xo








Serena Lewis said...

Ooops, forgot to say how happy I am to hear you sounding much better after your recent bout with illness. xo

andi filante said...

So glad you're feeling better! And wow, I used to be a smoker too. I can't imagine it anymore, but there was a time! And you mentioned drop box. I have that app on my phone but have never looked into it. Now I'm curious. I'm doing a horrible job keeping up with technology. :)

-andi

Anonymous said...

It fascinates me seeing grouse so close to your home, I've only seen them from a distance in the wild. Geese can be fierce, but they are majestic. There was a white goose that lived around the lake outside of my old apartment and it hated my dog. he would follow us and just hiss at my dog and try to chase her. She give it a good go though. sometimes I think he just liked to play with her. Grumpy goose.
Yay for spending birthday money on something you wanted.
a non smoking place to live. that sounds nice. but I can't see a smoker actually not smoking in their place when it gets so cold where you are. I'm sure some do not consider their balcony smoking in their place. and smokers smoking right by the door when I enter a building...ugh. i don't want to walk through that.
We just moved into a house where there was a smoker. he supposedly smoked outside. It didn't smell so bad when we were looking. But now that we've moved in the master bedroom, especially the bathroom...really stinks. I'm going to have to take all the blinds down and wash them, wash the windowns, the walls...something. It is driving me crazy. and my head is not liking it.
To think I grew up in a smoking household. i just can't stand it now and makes my asthma go crazy.
yes, I've had journals, so many started and then they'll have huge gaps. I have so many that have just a few pages written on and the rest is blank. now i journal more on the computer.
good writing.

Sherry Ellis said...

Those Canadian geese can certainly have attitudes!

Anonymous said...

You've finally got some sun! Still snowing over here...

Jo-Anne's Ramblings said...

Where to start well loved all the photos, always like to see Karma. I also loved to write in diaries and journals and like the give the girl a journal idea, I also keep my old diaries much to the annoyance of my daughters who can't see the point.

Feral Turtle said...

Gotta love that fertilizer to green up the grass. I think the snow we had this morning actually greened up mine! So nice that you have been journalling all these years Rita, and great that it helped you with life's curve balls!

Carol said...

You have quite a bit of wildlife at your window for living in town :) That's one of the reasons I love living in the city. SO SO HAPPY to see that you are definitely feeling much better!!! I'm moving about much better and the second injection was a breeze :)

Intense Guy said...

I'm glad to see some green grass in your neck of the woods! It has been a chilly week here.

Nice to see Karma is doing well - she seems happy in the new place.

Big male "white chin strap ducks" can be quite intimidating.

I guess the addition of smoking ... is a form of insanity.

Halle said...

I so enjoy reading your ramblings. Writing can be so therapeutic. I only tend to write in a journal when I'm working something out or genuinely pissed off. It helps me to blow off some steam and process. "Talking" it out on paper is as good as verbally processing (something else I do) for me. I'm always afraid that my family might find and read my ramblings...