Tuesday, October 10, 2017

Tuesday-11:30am

The Girls showed up in the afternoon before I had replenished the seed supply.  We've had freeze warnings the past two nights and the cold weather seems to have them wound up.  
I put out some food and they did return so I could finally show you how they rapid fire peck that seed--LOL!  I don't think you can hear the clucking very well, but here's the sweet girls.
The grouse and the injured geese are the only birds that Annie hasn't lunged at to scare for fun.
I think the grouse are just a bit too large for Annie to want to mess with.
She is fascinated but she sits quietly.
As you can see, the bird feeder is now out on a table again for the winter.
Dagan came over last Friday evening.  He moved the brown patio chairs and a couple of fans to the garage for me; brought in a humidifier & small table I use to park it on for the winter; and filled the bird feeder and brought that in from the garage, too.  Even went on a cat toy hunt--LOL!  
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Leah got ahold of me yesterday while she was at Costco because she noticed that my favorite shampoo and conditioner were on sale (Pantene) in Costco's gigantic bottles--LOL!  I am so spoiled!
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I have been thinking a lot about how blessed I am.  My life had been an endless roller coaster ride of traumas, hurdles, crises, life altering events, continual change (moved over 30 times in 31 years until I moved up here), near death experiences, had a baby girl I gave up for adoption, homeless for a summer, trials & tribulations, rapes, raising a boy alone who wasn't supposed to live (12 years of constant sickness and stethoscopes till he had the fontan procedure and a pacemaker), bad to scary relationships, two failed marriages (one involved him threatening me with a gun), injuries, illnesses...but I always had faith that things would get better.  I always knew I could survive, learn a new job, do anything I had to do......until I couldn't.
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When my health went down the tubes, couldn't support myself anymore, could barely function from day to day, living in constant pain, was physically forced to quit college (2004), was going to lose my apartment, and had no money TO move...well, I thought my life was basically over.  I didn't have the strength to just keep pushing through like I always had and physically absolutely could not do that anymore.  My body had become the boss of me.  How could anybody hurt this much and not be dying.  I'd wake to wet cheeks because I had been crying in my sleep.
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In the eleventh hour I finally got approved for disability (3rd time), got enough back pay to afford to move, and found a low-income apartment in Fargo.  (West Winds where Karma and I lived for close to 11 years up on third floor.)  And who would have thought that these would end up being the very best years of my life?!  (Ignoring physically, of course.) 
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Life did get better.  
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This feels like my reward for surviving all the rest.  :)  
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I relish my quiet, peaceful, boring days.  Dagan has done so amazingly well--has a good job--fell in love with a wonderful woman I adore.  Leah is a gift on so many levels...and they have two little boys in their family now!  They even helped me to move here where I can watch the girls and the ground squirrels.
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Sorry.  
Crying.  
Happy tears.  
Overwhelmed with gratitude.  
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I don't feel alone anymore.
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There's nothing more precious in this life than that.
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I love my life!!
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Wouldn't have changed a thing.  :)
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Oh, goodness!  
I need to take a break...
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Okay--glad no one can see my blubbering and blowing my nose--LOL! 
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Anyways, I need to do more work on headers in my bullet journal.  When I set it up I did a little experimenting with a new font...
..but then got lazy and just stuck to faux-calligraphy.
Until this month.  :)

I found this font online.
I plan to use the two font instructions I got from Lindsey's TPK (The Postman's Knock) for November and December.  I have been in low gear and more pain than usual for a couple of months...but when I do feel up to doing anything extra I have so many things lined up.  :)  And when I am having noodle days with few spoons...I have endless things to watch!  Good thing I was a TV Baby from the 50s and have always been a movie lover, too.  I can escape into Netflix, Amazon Prime, Acorn TV...endless programs to pick from that can make me forget about my body for a while.  And I can chat with you because of the internet!  What a world.  Couldn't have picked a better time to be housebound, eh?  :)
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 And Annie McGregor is becoming a true feline companion...little by little.
When she thinks I am too busy typing at the table to notice her she sneaks up on the end table by the patio window.
I still miss Karma.  But I am falling in love with Miss Annie.  OMG!!  Despite her having the smelliest cat poop of any cat I've ever lived with!  No wonder she wanted to go sit by the open patio door--LOL!
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Life is a treasure.  :) :)
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"One way to open your eyes is to ask yourself, 'What if I had never seen this before?  What if I would never see it again?'"
Rachel Carson

21 comments:

  1. Sometimes we have to sift through a lot of garbage before we find the filet mignon!!

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  2. Oh yes Ms Rita.. its the little things in life that make life worth living.. to not be alone... to be secure, safe , happy and loved. that may seem like such small things to some but they mean so much.. i count my blessings every single day... and to try to never , ever take anything for granted... Hugs! deb

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  3. Happy tears are sweet tears. The girls sure go after that seed. I heard a little clucking. I bet that becoming a gramma is the greatest reward of all. You deserve great joy, my friend. I wouldn't complain if your physical pain went away, but you are good about keeping your spirits up through everything. You help me keep my spirits up, too.

    Love,
    Janie

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  4. Well, now you have me blubbering and blowing my nose. :)

    You continue to amaze me with your strength and resilience and your love of life. what a life story you have (that should be written, hint, hint).

    I just realized your dear Karma passed in my absence. I'm so sorry. I'm glad you've found new companionship.

    I see you have grouse ... I miss seeing the families of quail that frequented my patio in Santa Fe. So fun to watch them grow ... and such a joy to have wildlife right outside your city door. :)
    I'm glad I stopped by today. I needed inspiration and you always provide it in spades. Thank you. :)

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  5. Oh Rita! The times I count my blessings! You had me going there for a while as I reflected upon all that I have to be grateful for too! I loved catching up - sorry only this comment! Annie is settling nicely! I loved seeing your lettering and your fabulous little flower drawings! It's so good to see your grandsons too! Big Hugs, Chrisx

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  6. Reading this made me think bloody hell you have been through so much and all these things have made you the amazing woman you are now, we need to recognise all our blessing in life and see things as blessings even things that don't seem that good at the time they are happening can turn out to be blessings.

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  7. Freeze warnings?! Our high today was 88F lol

    A peaceful life is a blessing, and it's a blessing to recognize what we have in our lives that gives us joy. I enjoy many of the same things you do: family, patio-watching, movies, visiting with online friends I've never met (and some I have).... I hope your blessings grow as you continue settling in.

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  8. You hung in there when it all looked impossibly bleak. And now look: two beautiful grandchildren, a loving family who looks after you and appreciates you, too. The pain and limitations aren't wonderful, but you have made the best of it all, and then some. And yes, the Internet. I've been a friend for almost a decade and look forward to many many more years of enjoying each other! Sending you big virtual hugs, Rita. Annie, too. :-)

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  9. You have been through the mill but are in a better place now. Those Grandboys make everything all better.
    I bet you wonder about your daughter...where she is and how she is.
    It froze here this morning if I had a pumpkin it woulda had frost on it :)

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  10. You have certainly had a lot of trauma in your life, but somehow you came out of it and raised a son who loves you dearly.

    Pantene is my favorite shampoo, too, but I am not a member of Costco. Good for you.

    We also have FROST warnings tonight and it's supposed to be in the 80s by Thursday.

    I agree that we all have many things to be blessed about. I may not have money like my friends, I may not have aid, but I have internet and local friends who seem to care about me, just as you have, too. Let's count those blessings, too, dear FRIEND.

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  11. You are for sure blessed Rita - with family and pets , living in a wonderful area and making such amazing art!
    Sending you hugs!♥♥♥

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  12. HUgs, life can totally knock us about and it is wonderful to be able to feel gratitude for all blessings! Enjoy them!
    So wonderful to see the grouse feasting...magical! and your new cat is sweet. AW, hugs to Karma, wishing you happy memories always!

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  13. Loved hearing you on the video! And how fun to have The Girls to watch. I worry about my birds at my other house who were used to winter feed. I won't be there this year - can't leave it as raccoons get into it so it won't be there anyways. Great job on the calligraphy! I can see you are going to manage that just as beautifully as everything else you do. Lovely post. Wonderful reminder as I'm stuck in the middle of stuff right now. Hugs to you!

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  14. Wonderful post! You have really been through a lot. Such a survivor you are and inspiration. So glad you're in my life. Take care, my internet Fargo friend :)

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  15. Family is such a blessing and they do make life worth living ♥

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  16. Good on you, Rita! I admire your optimism and determination.

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  17. I enjoyed the grouse videos...love watching birds in the wild and their antics.

    Lovely that Dagan dropped in to help sort a few things...and then Leah, thinking of you while she was shopping...so sweet.

    Goodness, you have had a full and topsy-turvy life with so many influences — good and bad. I've had some real lows in my life too...like you, ones where it was hard to see a positive change coming...but it did and I am grateful.

    Life can be so hard at times and we can feel very, very low...thinking back over those times and how you overcame them can cause a lot of emotions to rise up. (((Hugs)))

    Being grateful for even the little things helps us more than we realise.

    As you know, I'm dealing with some bad pain days myself at the moment.

    While there will never be another Karma, Annie is another blessing for you to enjoy and love...despite the smelly poop! haha Michelle's cat was extremely smelly when it pooped...her covered litter box was in their laundry and the stink would waft all the way down to their lounge room. Michelle was not impressed with that part of having a cat. haha

    Love and hugs from DownUnder! xo

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  18. Wow Rita, what an adventure your life has been. Through all the troubles you must have become such a strong woman. I take that back, you must have always been such a strong woman. I really admire your honesty too. Now onto those quails, boy are they little piggies. Your video was fascinating. I enjoyed your post, its good to get to "know" people on-line. :) Hugs-Erika

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  19. You've had quite a life. You could probably write a book about it.

    Glad you and Annie are getting along splendidly. I'm sure she's enjoying all the entertainment outside!

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  20. The simple blessings seem to be the best ones.

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  21. Oh my goodness...I had no idea that you went through so much in your life. You surely have had quite a few trials and tribulations along the way. It sounds like you are settling into a comforting routine and have much to be grateful for now.

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