Monday, April 08, 2019
We've had melting temps during the days. By Friday I could see first floor again across the way...
...and a car in the parking lot.
At one point I couldn't see all of third floor the snow was piled so high...what? two weeks ago? We have had a sudden shift into spring. Have even had light, drizzly rain a couple of days.
This entire week has been a sleep recovery one for me. I still can't sleep in my bed but I am sleeping better and longer in my chair, anyways. I managed to do laundry and make goulash and some soup.
I even had a Gramma Day on Saturday! Ian and I watched a couple episodes of the new David Attenborough series called "Our Planet" on Netflix streaming. Was so nice to be back to watching our nature shows. Ian and I will be learning about how the earth is changing and how it is effecting the wildlife and plants. He ate goulash with me and we took apart the big jigsaw puzzle together. We always have such a good time. :)
Yesterday I saw it had gotten up to 61 degrees! Goodness! This is what it looks like right now.
The walls of snow are shrinking away.
Brown grass is uncovered.
(And a lot of rabbit poop--LOL!).
It's a fluffy cloud day.
I've spent most of the week having pajama days, so I don't have much laundry to do today. The dryer is rolling along. The patio door is wide open (58 degrees) and the bedroom window. Grackles are arguing on the patio. Annie is sleeping in the chair next to me by the table. I am hopeful for this coming week.
Last week I never got back to the book, but maybe this week. I did catch up on letters for the first time this entire year--tada! So today I can start on my birthday thank you cards. :) Leah is planning to try to make it over for a Craft Nite tonight--whoohoo! I really hope she can make it.
I'm tentatively planning to try to make it over to McFamily's for my birthday ice cream cake and a nice long visit on Thursday. We'll see how this week goes. :)
After reading Djan's post today (here) about the Five Buddhist Remembrances...well, I keep thinking about how grateful I am for my life. How lucky I was to have almost drown when I was 10; to have watched the roof being ripped off the junior high gymnasium during a tornado when I was 14; and to have been snatched off the street walking home, beaten, raped, and told they were going to kill me when I was 17. Lucky because I learned early that life can change or end in an instant. I experienced on an intensely personal level how precious life is and how grateful I am to be here.
True. I didn't realize what blessed gifts those events truly were for years, especially the rape. But they forced me to make important life choices early on.
We choose every day.
We choose who we are and how we will live. We have this day, this moment...and isn't it delicious? We can choose to carry fear and hate with us or to carry love and joy. We choose. And when it is so difficult to free ourselves of the hate and fear--we can choose to work at releasing it...to lean a different direction...right now, this moment. If we keep at it...if we keep wanting to choose love and joy and kindness and patience...if we practice...we move toward it...then it becomes a part of us. Fake it till you make it--LOL! What you truly desire becomes a part of the very core of you. And it's never too late. Ever. To choose.
Having those experiences even helped me later to know that a child was not "mine"...was not a possession...but a miraculous gift...to do the best I could with as caretaker for however long.
I think I was a better mother of a baby I was told wouldn't live. Because I had already moved into a present moment state of being long ago and could appreciate every day on its own...every moment. But also to teach him to be aware of his choices in his life...of who he was...right now...no matter the future...no matter his age.
Yes, we all grow old, have illnesses, die, and change is inevitable. I love the fifth remembrance:
My actions are my only true belongings. I cannot escape the consequences of my actions. My actions are the ground upon which I stand.
Who we want to be.
How we treat others.
How we treat ourselves.
(still can be my own worst enemy)
What we say and think.
(still working on loving thoughts toward certain, shall we say, "public" people)
We are all a work in progress.
I feel blessed and lucky to have had this life of mine.
Grateful beyond belief.
I keep working on trying to choose well...every moment.
Till next week, my friends. :) :)
"In the evening of life,
we will be judged on love alone."
St. John of the Cross