Thursday-6:30pm

We brought back the supplements from Apex Energetics and SP. I forgot that Dr. John wasn't doing adjustments after the 28th, and he had gone to Arizona for a week. So, we explained to Erica and are waiting to hear back. Pam emailed me and found Apex online and it said they only take back unopened bottles and charge you 12% to take them back! Certainly no money back guarantee there, eh? So, I am sure that is what we will hear back from Erica eventually. I'm glad we returned them when we did, I guess.

Lessons learned are sometimes costly, but it is always a good and positive thing to have learned another lesson. :)

I had my first adjustment with Dr. Mike. He does things a little differently, of course. He does this pressure thing, pressing with his hands where he kind of stretched my lower back, and that felt good. And when he did the hammer in a spot on my neck that really hurt, he massaged out the knot, he said. Nice! I'll be seeing him on Monday.

We went to Dagan and Leah's afterwards. From the grill Leah and I had tofu hotdogs and Dagan had brats. While we ate all three of us watched the videos I found on the Shaklee website where you can meet the new owner and hear about the product, etc. Dagan gave his "official approval" for Leah to start it up as a business as soon as she feels ready. :) She wants to wait until she knows she is feeling better and so do I--we want the proof for ourselves first. But we both have had such strong feelings that this is right, and both have gotten zapped about Shaklee, that we feel pretty sure we will!

After that Leah & I worked on our Shaklee order and filled out the paperwork. Leah put in a call to Renae and waited for her to call back (the specials only went to the end of August). No painting last night.

Dagan went off to play X-Box. Leah pointed out to me that both Dagan and I have these funny faces when we are concentrating hard--mouths hanging open. I guess I do the same thing when I am painting, crafting, or sometimes even watching TV or a movie. Hey! We are in the zone!!

Dagan gave me a ride home. Leah called me after she heard back from Renae. Pam called me while I was typing her an email--again! hehe! Can't tell we are all excited about this, eh? It is just nice to know it is such a pure product and they are so concerned with the earth -- that means a lot to me. The company hasn't "sold out" in all these years since I was a kid selling Basic-H door to door. I think I expected that it would have, to be honest. And have been so delighted that the company hasn't changed. Word of mouth and sticking to their own set of high standards for 50 years. Not an easy thing to do.

I was so excited with talking about Shaklee, Healing Touch (Leah is still interested in taking classes), and possibly even Dagan & Leah building a self-sustaining home in the country one day(!!!!) that I had a hard time getting to sleep. But once I did, I slept 10 hours and only woke up twice!! I could use several days like that after not sleeping well for 2 1/2 weeks. I am just physically drained--but the brain is going a mile a minute--hehe! I slept so long because it was a dark and rainy day today.

Tonight I am watching a two-part special from the Empire Falls book from my friend Ruby! :)

Wednesday-3pm

Didn't sleep well last night. I actually think part of it was just being nervous about bringing all the pills back today and, subsequently, wondering if I'd feel okay to even make it there today. So far, so good. Leah will come after work in less than an hour, so looks like it might be a green light today??

Yesterday I watched Elizabeth I made by HBO as a miniseries:

Helen Mirren earned an Emmy win for her portrayal of Queen Elizabeth I in this HBO miniseries chronicling the effect of the monarch's public role on her private life. Unable to wed the man she loves, the Earl of Leicester (Jeremy Irons, who won an Emmy for his role), Elizabeth flirts with the idea of marrying a French prince and later sets her sights on the earl's stepson (Hugh Dancy). This historical drama scored the Emmy for Best Miniseries.

I really liked it a lot! Helen Mirren brought reality and humanity to the part and showed the woman behind the image Elizabeth herself helped to create. I watched the DVD specials and they said they took great care to represent the facts of her life as best they could and claim it is the most realistic portrayal that has been done so far. I really enjoyed it!

Last night I could hear Karma talking to me while I was making dinner, but I couldn't find her. It was kind of like "Where's Waldo"?!

Today we bring back the supplements.

I do hope it goes well and they are willing to reimburse us. I know they probably can't for anything that is opened (zip-lock bag)--we don't want them, regardless, so we are bringing those back, too. Leah has even more than I do! She had over two boxes this size. We both feel so badly because we really like Dr. John--and he had the best of intentions--and he has a new baby--and they're moving... *sigh* That is why this is going to be so difficult. :(

Anyways, Leah will be here soon, so I have to finish getting ready. 82 degrees and sunny again today! They're talking thunderstorms tomorrow--but it is yet another beautiful day today!! :) After Dr. John's we go over to Dagan and Leah's apartment and tonight is Painting Night (acrylics). Not sure I am up to it, actually, this time. But--Leah and I are going to go thru our Shaklee order and put it in together tonight so that we can get the August specials. She and Dagan are going to spot me the money, Leah said. So we will be able to start on the Shaklee sooner this way and save some money!! Nice! Got to get moving...

Tuesday 9pm

Since I have been in the mood to take pictures of old stuff--hehe! This is the first painting I did at the watercolor class I went to at the Plains Art Museum in Fargo a few years back--maybe 3? We used real leaves and saran wrap with this one. It hangs behind Gracie's cage these days.

And this was the other painting from that class. We got a sketch of a poinsettia that we could do whatever we wanted with. I made mine white and found out I really love color! :)

Many of you have seen both of these as cards I had printed up at Office Max--and may see more of them, as I have some left--hehe! Odd looking Christmas cards that rainbow poinsettia painting made, to be sure! But--can't say it wasn't an original--chuckle!

I am a dabbler.

Monday-5pm

I was taking pictures last night for a couple of my Eons.com groups and thought I'd post them here, too. This is a small wall hanging that I made with black polymer clay, pressed in a rubber stamp, colored with Pearl Ex powders, punched holes, baked, and Leah attached a coiled copper wire for me. Was easy and fun! I have it hanging in my bathroom.

I think you can click on any of these pictures in the blog and enlarge them?

Then for a beading group I posted the first jewelry that I made. Nothing fancy. I had been wearing the focal pieces on the necklaces for years just hanging them on leather or black cotton cords. I wanted to make real necklaces out of them, so that is what I started out with. Not that I have made much progress since then, but here they are.

I discovered how difficult it is to get pictures of jewelry, too! These were taken on black felt and it seemed to change the colors of the pieces--the center one is blue lapis. Oh well, for now--it was the best I could do.

Since I can't do the crimping and small wire bending handiwork, my friend, Lynnette, from Minneapolis (who introduced us to beading) and Leah, my daughter-in-law, put the earrings together for me. I know a few of the small earrings were a gift from Lynnette when we first started a few years back. She let me string together what I wanted and she finished them for me.

Leah does all the finishing work on my pieces for me (can't grip with my bad arm very well). Most of what we made since we first started was for the craft business and was sold. Leah has a series of memory wire necklaces she made for herself that she wears all the time. People often comment on them.

These are a few of the bookmarks we made with beads. We sold quite a few of these--ribbon and sterling silver chain. These are mine--"leftovers" that I kept. The ladybug necklace above has the same pretty sterling silver chain that we used on the bookmarks.

My camera doesn't seem to be able to take close ups all that well--or I don't know how to do it--that is more like it--hehe! I tried several ways and angles--these were the best I could manage. I think I just don't know enough about lighting maybe??

We made a lot of bookmarks on cardstock that we laminated, too. I use those all the time!! Several at a time, as a matter of fact, being the compulsive reader that I am. (Some of you have gotten them as gifts in the mail!) I use the ss beaded ones sometimes for my book I keep by my bed. I guess I am more afraid of them breaking or losing them--but nothing has ever happened to them so far. I especially love those delicate sterling silver chain ones! :)

I was reading online about who won the TV awards--yesterday, I think? I ordered the HBO version of Elizabeth I (two discs) that won and it is coming right away! Also ordered The Girl In The Cafe that was mentioned. Then I ran across an HBO version of one of my friend Ruby's books I read this summer, Empire Falls, that I really liked (two discs). So, I should have some interesting things coming to watch. I'll let you know what I think of them, of course. :)

I was still not feeling well enough to make it to Dr. John's today. :(

Leah emailed me that she has to work at her second job on Thursday nights for a while, so when I called to cancel today I also switched to Wednesdays. I most certainly should feel up to going by Wednesday, I hope! Wednesdays will work well--we can go to the chiro and then right over to Dagan & Leah's to paint! :) I want to be up to that in two days. So--R&R for me and off I go...

Sunday-2:30pm

Here's my painting that Jennifer, her mom, and I worked on last summer, fall, and winter.

This is a closer look, or as close as I could get and have most of it in the photo. I am not sure if you can click on pictures and enlarge them in the blog, but I think you can??

Here's a shot a little farther away.

I like to show mine first before you see what it is supposed to look like--chuckle!

This is the template that came with the DVD. It was a long process with two intricate maskings. We never were able to perfect the technique that he used to do the trees on the left. He splattered paint and then dripped water from a broken spray bottle--it went on and on. We practiced and practiced and couldn't manage to come close to duplicating what he was demonstrating, so we all just finally went ahead and did our own thing with the darker trees. That is why mine ended up with less light spots and my trees look like a thicker forest--hehe!

Our sand was another thing we practiced and practiced and couldn't get it to look like his. And you had to just kind of pour and drip paint and pray in the end, anyways. We did the best we could. Below--this is what the painting is supposed to look like from the back of the DVD.

Obviously, this is why I don't show what mine was supposed to look like right off the bat--haha!

I have not matted and framed mine. Not sure I am happy enough with the results to spend the money to do that, actually. But we did learn a lot! About painting and masking techniques--not that we mastered them all, but we got the experience, anyways.

Another beautiful, windows-wide day! I am just hoping I will feel better by tomorrow so I can make it to Dr. John's to return the supplements. The way the weekend has been going--may or may not, depending on how my day goes tomorrow? Everything is going right thru me. I know--too much information. But facts are facts--hehe! I have been off the supplements for three days now today--maybe tomorrow will be better?? :)

I have been watching movies this weekend. Babette's Feast was recommended to me by my friend, Bonnie, in Hibbing, Mn. Was charming, quirky, and a sweet little movie:

Philippa (Hanne Stensgaard) and Martina (Vibeke Hastrup ) turn down a chance to leave their Danish town, instead staying to care for their pastor father and his small church. Thirty-five years later, a French woman (Stéphane Audran) seeks refuge, and Philippa and Martina (now Bodil Kjer and Birgitte Federspie) take her in. The feast the woman prepares in gratitude is eclipsed only by her secret in director Gabriel Axel's Oscar-winning drama.

Find Me Guilty--I saw a preview and it looked interesting to me because it was based on a true story and they used transcripts from the case. I normally would never have watched a movie with Vin Diesel in it, but I was surprised at his touching and humorous performance!

Training his lens on infamous mobster "Fat" Jack DiNorscio (Vin Diesel) -- a man who decided to defend himself in court rather than rat out his cohorts -- acclaimed director Sidney Lumet (Dog Day Afternoon, 12 Angry Men) recounts the longest Mafia trial in U.S. history. Ron Silver and Annabella Sciorra co-star in this gripping legal drama, which draws its dialogue from actual courtroom transcripts.

My timer just went off. Have to get up and move and stretch.

So that's it for today. :)

Saturday-6:30

Okay--to continue--Leah came over after work and we talked about a lot of things! She had been thinking some of the same things I had been--that we absolutely have to bring back the supplements to Dr. John's on Monday, for one. Leah has been taking supplements for about a year and has recently had to go on inhalers. Obviously not working positively for her either. Also, she may have found her passion!! She has been wondering what she is supposed to be doing with her life, too--as have I. The past couple months at Sacred Circle she has been talking about how she has been feeling she was supposed to do something to help people and has been thinking about taking Healing Touch classes or learning some kind of energy work. Well, selling Shaklee would be really helping people if it works! And she could take the Healing Touch classes, too. And she'd like to take some classes on nutrition, too. :)

I know it sounds like we're jumping into Shaklee with both feet, but that is not the case. We both had the feeling that we would just start out taking the supplements from Shaklee and see how it went. But both of us had this weird future vision, kind of--that she'd get better first within several months and it would take me more like a year or two, but that I'd improve, too. That this would actually work! We were both getting zapped talking about it!! :):):) Leah would start learning how to sell Shaklee part-time after she feels better and has personal proof that it works. And then, as my health permits--I could be her volunteer helper like I was for her craft business. We always did work well together, and we are both people who get really enthused about something we believe in! If Shaklee can even just cure my IBS--I will be shouting their praises from the rooftops! hehe!

We knew we have been on the right track with the healthier eating and the supplements and exercise route--but things just weren't working out. Especially for me! My body reacted badly--in no uncertain terms--did not want these supplements from Dr. John's. We might get a chance to talk to him about Shaklee before he leaves, too. We know he believes he has the best quality vitamins and supplements and truly has a healer's soul. We want to at least tell him what we know since he will starting up a brand new practice--maybe he could sell Shaklee products instead? Who knows? He may already be contracted with these other companies. Hey--he could read my blog from Arizona and find out if we got good results and how long it took. :) We just like him a lot and wish him the best and feel so badly that we are having to bring back all the boxes of supplements. :( But--we have to do what we feel in our hearts and souls is the right thing to do.

I am feeling positive again about the possibility of having more physical improvements in the future. I have definitely learned that I need a chiropractor to keep me from getting that horrible tailbone pain and keep my shoulders loosened up. I am definitely continuing on with the healthier eating. I am going to try adding back some whole wheat since I haven't honestly noticed any changes from being 95% off wheat and dairy for two months. And I don't notice any changes after the little wheat and dairy I have consumed here and there. My sinuses and sniffles are apparently from allergies. Windows open--I will blow my nose and occasionally sneeze. Windows closed--much, much less. I didn't lose any weight. I didn't feel any less painful in my joints or muscles--or any more than I did after a few weeks of adjustments from Dr. John, I should say. And the past two weeks, of course, I have been feeling awful!

The last two nights I took a pain pill and a couple of Tylenol PMs. I slept a little better on Thursday night-7 hours. But last night I crashed for 12 hours! Finally got some good sleep and am just starting to feel a little rested again. Noodle day again today, that's for sure.

Last night Pam was in town and stopped by late and we gabbed on and on about Shaklee and all of this. too. She had no intentions of actually selling Shaklee and just wanted to become a member for the 15% discount (only $19.95 and you can order online). But now she is thinking kind of like Leah--that maybe she might if she starts to feel better, too. It is exciting to feel hopeful again! I told her I am just going to start out with the vitamin for women over 50, the protein powder, and the stuff they have for digestive problems. It's all about finding balance in your body again. If it wasn't for Dr. John and his testing, I wouldn't know my areas to focus on. Everything happens for a reason.

Now, I'm not going to predict that I will be 100% healed. Obviously, the Universe has kept hitting me over the head with trying to heal myself--and I have tried several things. I guess they say--you don't know what works or doesn't work unless you try. Some things have been working and some things haven't. Small victories!! If I could be free of the IBS--I'd be mobile again!! Then my world would open up again and I'd be able to be out on the buses, etc. I don't want to get too excited about it, but I am feeling hopeful again. I asked God/the Universe/GA in the beginning of this year--what am I supposed to be doing? And I got that I was supposed to focus on my health. So, I have asked them to help me and make it abundantly clear if I am on the right path or not. Definitely knew I was supposed to be going to Dr. John--zapped--loud and clear--got some results quickly. I guess I assumed I should take the supplements he had, since he was a green light and taking supplements felt right to be doing. Guess I just had the wrong supplements--hehe! Definitely getting the green light for Shaklee!! No doubts. So, I expect to see something--some kind of improvement?? And that's it for today--whew! :):)

Friday 3:30pm

Went to Dr. John's with Leah and we both got adjusted. I had dropped back to one of each pill yesterday morning and wasn't sure if I wanted to get into the situation with him or not. I told him I was still having a lot of trouble with the IBS and almost didn't make it yesterday again. Got done with my turn and he started working on Leah. I was sitting in the waiting room and Erica, the receptionist, started talking to me and asking me how I was doing--and I told her about cutting back on the supplements. Dr. John heard us talking and after he was done with Leah came out and sat in the waiting room--wanted to find out what was going on. I explained how awful this has been for me the past two weeks. He told me to stop taking them altogether for a few days and then start back up with just the HCL (ones for stomach). He was concerned. I know he means well and wants the best for his clients. I could tell it was upsetting to him to hear I was having so much trouble with the supplements.

After Dr. John's we went to Leah's. She turned the TV on for me (they have like four remotes!) and left me instructions on paper about how to find stored TV shows. Then she went off to try out a yoga class. After she came back, she gulped down a sandwich (I couldn't eat all day again for fear I'd never make it to the meeting last night), and then we headed out for Kindred for the Shaklee meeting at Pam's house. We were a little late. It was farther than we thought, I guess.

I knew I wanted to try to make this meeting if humanly possible, no matter how crummy I felt. I remember Shaklee from when I was a kid and my mom became a member. I only knew about the biodegradable soap, Basic-H, at the time. I was so impressed that I went on my own and sold it door to door to the neighborhood ladies! You could use it for anything and everything--wash your hair, dishes, car, dog, take a bath with it, brush your teeth with it, whatever--safe for you and the environment. Back then, nobody owned dishwashers and I told them how I was letting the dishwater cool off and recycling it and watering my mom's plants with it! Is it any wonder I grew up to be a hippie/flower child?! The hippies started out so concerned about the environment and building a better world. Too bad it all switched to sex and drugs. *sigh*

Anyways, it was a wonderful meeting!! Even tho I had trouble sitting and had to get up and stand a couple of times (and I am paying for that today). I was so pleased to learn that Shaklee is still the wonderful company that it was 45 years ago--in fact, they just had their 50 year anniversary! They have much more proof of the quality of their vitamins and supplements. They still operate bascially the same way--letting the product sell itself and not pushing people. The lady who ran the meeting, Renae Leiss, was from Dickinson. Very informative and personable woman--really knows her stuff--one of the top six people in the Shaklee Company!

They are still concerned about the naturalness and purity of their products--to the point of letting fields sit for seven years to replenish the soil nutrients, doing scientific studies to prove that the supplements actually deliver the goods (over 100 published studies, she said, and other companies don't have more than two), products are tested for (6,7- can't remember now) years before they ever go on the market, and not heating the product over 70 degrees during manufacturing to keep the nutrients from being destroyed. Very impressed!

On the ride home Leah and I were already discussing returning the supplements to Dr. John's. They obviously do not agree with me--at all. I was getting worse over the course of the two weeks instead of better. They're made by Apex Energetics--except for the Prolamine Iodine which is made by Standard Process. I know those are better than the stuff off the shelf at WalMart--but by this morning, I was positive I'd rather go with Shaklee if I am spending this much money. And, I'll just take it slower--start out with the vitamins for over 50 and the stuff to help digestion.

Leah is coming over after work--she's on her way--so I'll have to continue with this later. :)

Wednesday-3am

This flower could end up trashed like the last one I attempted, but I'll put in the progress reports. I put a second yellow wash and a darker wash for the center. Not really sure what I am doing, but I'll keep trying. :)

Meanwhile--give her an inch.....

Tonight was painting night at Dagan and Leah's. Dagan picked me up after work and we went to their place. Leah wasn't home yet and he had to run the antenna and equipment back to "GoMoorhead" because they had zero reception. I said I'd ride with and stay in the car while he ran in. Then we were going to go to Target so I could pick up a couple of things.

I opened the car door to catch some breeze and listen to the birds--and people watched. Endlessly fascinating to me. Saw oodles of folks going into Vic's Bar and Grill for the 5-7pm special. Hamburger and fries for $1.99. Lots of people with grey hair who seemed to come regularly for the great bargain, groups of ladies, middle-aged couples, lone customers-male & female. A lady stomp-walking in a rush across the parking lot with a deep scowl, a slow couple holding hands, a man rushing out to put up the top on his Corvette because the sky had darkened up, a grandma and grandpa with a grandchild strung between their hands, and a pretty woman whose bosom rode high and jiggled more than any I have seen in a good long while. I wondered if she had filled that big, push-up bra with jello! She looked like a very smiley person, so they seemed appropriate for her. :)

I noticed a few pigeons sitting on the top edge of the higher section of the building (where I think the Moorhead City Hall is?), 4-5 floors vs. the flat rest of the mall. A flock of maybe 100 pigeons flew in from the nearby Red River and as they buzzed the top of the sandy colored building it looked like another 100 hidden pigeons took off from the roof of the building. It was a sight to see--how they moved together and swooped and circled. Half of them eventually took off in a new direction and half settled back, out of sight, on top of the building--but whether they were in the same flocks is anybody's guess.

I was thinking about how people don't usually notice birds--and how I always see birds--when Dagan showed up--with the GoMoorhead equipment. I was almost surprised to see him! I get in the zone and forget time. He'd been gone like maybe 40 minutes! The box had no reception in their store, either, so they got a tech guy to take it apart. He found a loose wire and fixed it. So, they talked Dagan into giving it another try.

Anyways, it was too late to run to Target, by that time, if we were going to paint--and Dagan was hungry. So we went back to their place. Turned out I was the only one who wanted to paint. They both just weren't in the mood and watched some TV programs they had "collected". I don't know what to call what they do? It's not taping, that's for sure.

I just decided to practice and practice the scumbling and blending techniques. That is all I am doing. Over and over. I am having trouble getting the colors I want when I mix--not dark enough--or too light. I just plain need lots of practice. Jerry Yarnell said this wasn't exactly a beginner technique and that you needed to practice until you got the hang of it--and he wasn't joking! So, I am practicing and practicing. By the time I am getting the hang of this there will probably be half and inch of paint on that board--ha! But, I am getting looser, taking more chances, and being braver--enjoying myself and having fun!

Dagan and Leah said I just don't like to start with simple stuff. I should try to take a photo of the watercolor painting Jennifer, her mom, and I worked on last summer, fall, and winter. It was a complicated lanscape that looked a lot easier to do on the DVD than it was, of course. We learned a lot, tho. But before I try to get a photo, I need to do the final tweaking that I never got around to. :)

Dagan did take me to Target on the way home. My remote died for the bedroom TV, so I needed to get a new one. I was leery and expected it to take me forever to program--was a snap! Just a GE Universal remote for $7.99. I like it because it is small, too! I also picked up some VCR tapes. The last ones I purchased were just awful! Maxell. Use them once or twice and they would get all snowy and kept skipping sections of what you were watching! The sound was all off and they didn't seem to be able to track after they were barely used? I am sure hoping that it isn't the VCR? This time I bought Sony and we'll see how they work??

I was tired and sore when I got home at close to 10pm. It had gotten so hot in here! I think it did get up to like 85 degrees today. Had to close it up and put the AC on. Takes a couple of hours for the place to cool down and longer to get the bedroom cooled off. Of course, I woke up again. I ate, spent some time on the computer, puttered with the watercolors, and watched what I could see of a special on prairie cemetaries and iron cross markers (PBS) and 30 Days on the bad tape.

I am seriously thinking of limiting my supplements to one of each per day--starting tomorrow. I have been having constant problems with the IBS and have a perpetual queasy stomach. It has been two weeks and I think that is long enough for a trial period. Maybe my body just needs smaller amounts over a longer period of time? Well, that's what it is going to get, anyways. I can't afford to be buying all of these again, anyways. I wanted to give this my best shot, but it is just ridiculous to put up with this for another six weeks. I have missed appointments with Dr. John, missed cooking with Dagan and Leah, and can't eat anything all day if I am going anyplace. Like tonight--finally ate at 10:30pm! And now tomorrow Leah and I have Dr. John's and afterwards we are going to a Shaklee meeting down in Kindred at Pam's house, south of Fargo about 15 miles. So, I shouldn't be eating tomorrow, either. I doubt that the effects of the supplements will subside that quickly and I am still planning on taking them when I get up. Only one of each and only when I first get up, tho, from now on. I am going to try that and see if it is any better.

Things just haven't been going as well as hoped lately--with the supplements and trying to bake with the wheat-free flour recipe.....

Maybe things will shift for the better in the food/health areas--who knows? In the meantime, I'll be waiting for my writing books to arrive and looking forward to getting back to some writing. I'll be painting--here at home and at Dagan & Leah's. Reading on the porch. Watching Netflix movies. And waiting for the IBS to clear up--haha!

Tuesday-6:00pm

After Caroline came and cleaned today, I started washing clothes.

I am so grateful to have washer and dryer hook-ups in this apartment. I was able to rent them for not much more than I paid a month anyways in quarters. With my bad arm, it is so nice not to have to haul baskets and laundry soap anymore! They are in this closet in the hallway next to the bathroom and are both humming away over there as I am writing this. :)

I decided to sign up for a couple of writing classes at the Barnes & Noble online university for September. I have taken classes from B&N before and they last about 4-5 weeks. You can just lurk if you want to--read assignments and postings (and there are a ton of people in each class in my experience). Or you can participate and post, if you are so inclined. The classes are free, but you need the book/books. You can follow along at your own pace--but the pace is naturally fast due to the short length of class time.

I had the book already for the fiction writer's class. Not my favorite to actually write, but love to read fiction, so I thought--what the heck, I can lurk! The other class is about memoir writing--right up my alley. I hope my books arrive in time. The classes don't begin until September 4th, I think it was. So, they should have plenty of time to get here. :)

I have just been tired of trying to focus on the health and foods, etc, all summer long--and not seeing much progress beyond what I saw in the first month or so. Haven't seen or felt any differences with the diet change. The supplements have just been making me feel kind of crummy in general. So--time to focus on something else for a while. Don't get me wrong--I am not giving up by any means. Am still going to eat healthier, go to the chiropractor, take the supplements, and so on--just don't want to focus on it because not much is happening and that gets frustrating. I think that's why the "you can heal yourself 100% if you really want to" stuff rubbed me the wrong way for a while. I was already disappointed that I hadn't felt any different. ??? So, I'm going to focus more on the writing classes, painting, my website, and the blogging.

I guess I believe we all go thru things for a reason--to learn spiritual lessons. If we could all just heal ourselves and create miracles any time we wanted to--we'd all be well and never die and be relatives from Nazareth. If we could have enough faith to heal and create miracles, we should be able to eliminate it all! No terrorists, wars, earthquakes, starvation, cruelty, accidents, beatings, killings, catastrophes, or evil of any kind. We'd all be just living in a heaven on earth. If all we had to do is believe it, the intensity of my faith in God and the power of love and goodness when I was a young girl should have created it already back in the 60s! chuckle! :)

Now, maybe we all have this capacity and just don't realize it? Maybe we have to all believe it at once for it to work? Maybe we can all learn to live in peace and harmony? I pray that is true. But--in the meantime--I am just trying to improve my life enough to be able to sit at the computer or paint maybe another hour-session a day and to maintain a positive attitude living with pain and exhaustion 24/7. I am making progress. Small outward steps. Huge inner leaps. :)

Monday-6pm

Dagan and I stopped off at Moorhead Center Mall before Dr. John's today. Dagan and Leah are trying to see how this new Moorhead Internet company will work. He needed an antenna to reach out to the balcony/outside to see if he can get any reception--so far they have nothing. If it does work, they might drop Cable One. Go Moorhead is less than half the cost, I think? I hope it works for them.

I didn't feel up to going over and cooking tonight so I just had Dagan bring me home. Was actually more the eating than the cooking--ha! The supplements have just been generally upsetting to my stomach--still. Dr. John did some of the NET work on the upset stomach problem today, so we'll see if I notice any changes.

When I walked in the door Karma was waiting for me by the bookcases in the hallway near the door--snoozing.

She's been lazy today. It got up to around 80 degrees. I didn't wanted to shut the windows, so it is a little warmer in here--and Karma especially loves to lounge and snooze in the heat. Plus, I didn't sleep very well and was up and down a lot--so much so that Karma gave up sleeping on the bed with me altogether and laid in the hallway by the bathroom. That way she'd know every time I was up, but wouldn't have to move. I'd stop and pat her on the head and say "Hi, Baby Girl" when I went by and she'd give me a little acknowledgment meow in return. (She and I converse all the time.)

Well, I have to go make some dinner.

Sunday-7pm

It's thundering out, so I'm not sure how long I will be able to write. I usually shut down the computer if I see lightning. The rain is light and coming straight down, so I haven't had to even close the windows so far.

Yesterday was a movie watching day for me. Watched Apres Vous:

A man's life changes forever with one selfless act in this romantic comedy. After stopping Louis (Jose Garcia) from committing suicide, well-meaning waiter Antoine (Daniel Auteuil) begins to feel responsible for the depressed man. Continuing to play Good Samaritan, Antoine decides to help Louis win back his ex-girlfriend, Blanche (Sandrine Kiberlain). But the do-gooder doesn't foresee the earth-shattering effect that Blanche will have on him. ...

Subtitled and French, I believe. Was one of those kind of silly romantic movies--a bit predictable, but entertaining. Nice to watch something light in contrast to The Sopranos--hehe!

Then I watched a strange, but intriguing movie called Winter Passing:

Upon learning that a publisher will pay dearly for the love letters her novelist father (Ed Harris) wrote to her late mother, Reese Holden (Zooey Deschanel) returns to Michigan after seven years away from home. But instead of the reclusive man she expected to find, she discovers her dad has formed a deep connection with the struggling musician (Will Ferrell) and ex-grad student (Amelia Warner) who now live under his roof. Amy Madigan co-stars.

It was the kind of oddball, character movie that I enjoy when they are done well. The daughter discovered that this peculiar group had formed a kind of family unit in her absence. She and her father had to either work out their differences or remain forever estranged. I was surprised that I enjoyed Will Farrell's portrayal in a bascially serious role--he provided just a touch of sad humor. He was pretty good. I think Ed Harris is a competent actor who enjoys taking on a variety of roles--this one was dark and the character was much older than I am used to seeing Ed Harris play. He was very good--as was the girl who played the former student, Amelia Warner. Can't say it had the best ending, but it was satisfying, I guess.

Then I watched some more of The Sopranos-season three. Tony's horrible mother (who had put a hit out on him) died a natural death and it was oddly unsatisfying--hehe! Quite the post-funeral gathering at the Soprano house--hard for anybody to find anything nice to say about that evil, nasty woman--chuckle! Tony's greedy sister has now kind of taken over the role of family member who you most want to see "get their just rewards"--ha! And you keep waiting for something to happen between Tony and his psychiatrist...

Since Miss Karma is usually within eyesight 95% of the time, even in this tiny apartment, I wondered where she had disappeared to late this afternoon? I hadn't seen her for quite a while. She only occasionally goes off to sleep--uninterrupted--finds someplace where she can't be disturbed, if she is really tired. I discovered her in a new spot! Curled up in the bottom of the pantry on a bag full of plastic grocery bags...

I went to throw something away in the big silver trash can and she meowed at me down there just to say hello (and let me know she was there just in case I was about to set something on her or squish her or anything, since she knew darn well I didn't know she was there and because she has never parked herself in the pantry so she isn't quite sure what I may or may not do in there). She startled me, of course. Even tho she always enjoys getting one over on me and usually cavorts with delight at scaring me, she was too tired to move...so I got her back by annoying her with flashing a couple of pictures--hehe!

The rain has apparently passed thru already. The field and grass smells with the fresh rain. It is still much darker than it would normally be. Too dark to read on the porch.

I have been milling things over the past few days. Wondering about my health, the 100%healing thing, my purpose in life, my faith, my path so far...not quite the "dark night of the soul" I suffered in my youth, but maybe more of a "dusk of the soul", I guess. Haven't figured anything out yet. Still just pondering and milling and questioning....

Saturday-5pm

Set up to paint.

Got this far today, anyways.

Thursday-8 pm

Not feeling very well today (IBS-just another one of those lovely fibro symptoms). I haven't had as many bouts with this since I changed my eating habits, but it's still around and unpredictable. Didn't make it to Dr. John's for my adjustment or to the Meet Dr. Mike Open House tonight. Leah will fill me in. Just reading (Arctic Dreams by Barry Lopez), watching TV, and paying porcelain homage today. I am sure glad I haven't had as many days like this as I used to! :)

Tuesday-6:30pm

Caught back-sprawled relaxing...

On this beautiful afternoon...

Too lazy to move. :)

Dagan came by for lunch and put AdAware on both computers so I can remove cookies and such. Another beautiful day. Supposed to have a possibility of rain by midnight. Have been getting more adjusted to the supplements, I think. Better night last night and day today. Karma and I are being lazy on the porch--hehe!

Am reading The Spirit Catches You And You Fall Down: A Hmong Child, Her American Doctors, and The Collision of Two Cultures by Anne Fadiman--another book of Duane's from college, I believe. Really fascinating to learn about the cultural differences, the Hmong background, and their belief systems. Human beings can think so differently! At one time in the factory where I hurt my arm we had a Hmong gentleman working there. I was the only person who seemed to be able to understand his English and wasn't afraid to ask him to repeat himself if I didn't, I guess. I shared tea with him from a tea club I was in at the time. He told me some stories about his culture. I had even scribbled a few of them down later--not sure where they are now, but I saved them--similar to what I am reading about now. He was such a nice man and so polite--respectful. I've been thinking about him off and on since I started reading this book a couple of days ago. :)

Monday-1:30am

Since I have still been feeling a little queezy, I passed on making food tonight over at Dagan and Leah's. Dagan just brought me to Dr. John's and home. Dagan came up afterwards and got Leah's supplements to bring home, so I suppose she might start tomorrow? Dr. John says my back is looking so much better than it did. I think it is staying in alignment a bit better than it was at first, too. I told him about not getting much sleep and being sick to my stomach from the supplements--but that I do believe it will all balance out in a short while and my system will get used to them. I seem to be better the last couple nights now. Still a little queezy, but nothing like I was over the weekend. My body isn't used to all these good things at once--hehe! (Plus--I think all the years doctors kept giving me Ibuprofen for my arm really effected my stomach--have had problems ever since.)

Dagan and Leah rescheduled their insurance appointment for Wednesday, so I am not making up an appointment with Dr. John that night (from missing last Thursday) and we decided not to meet for painting again because we'd end up starting too late. Which is okay with me--I need to just get used to these pills and get some sleep. Dagan stayed up too late while Leah was gone (wonder where he got the night owl tendencies from--hehe!) and Leah is tired from the trip, of course. So we are all a bit draggy this week, anyways.

I had played around this weekend trying to switch myself from the night shift as long as I was having trouble sleeping--and that just made matters worse. I guess I should just live my natural nocturnal life and leave well enough alone. I've been a night person for as long as I can remember. Fighting it usually backfires on me, so I don't know why I keep trying to change it? I have to alter my hours for appointments and such, anyways, here and there. But not drastically. I try to keep all appointments in the afternoon or evening. :)

Tonight I finally watched Transamerica:

Bree (Felicity Huffman) gets the shock of her life when a week before her final sex change surgery she discovers a son she didn't know she had. After bailing him out of jail the two set out on a cross-country journey riddled with road bumps. Huffman won numerous awards (and an Oscar nomination) for her role as a man longing to be a woman. Elizabeth Pena, Burt Young, Kevin Zegers and Graham Greene co-star.

I really liked the movie. It is more about people trying to connect with each other and being true to who you are and/or discovering who you are--parenting, acceptance, feeling loved, denial, lies, respect, dreams--and all with a humorous undertone. I don't think Felicity Huffman won, but she was very good! Everybody was good!

Another beautiful day--windows still open wide. :) Soon my very favorite season will be upon us--fall! Dagan told me that the Vikings were going to start playing already! Summer is nearly over already.

Lately I've been thinking again about my health and the getting healthy/being cured thing. Dr. John is very positive about getting back my health--having a less painful life, anyways. Then the first part of my reading from the shaman came and he saw me totally healthy and healed--said that I had just decided to be healed, transcended all beliefs about illness, asked for help from the trees and my guides, and I just did it! That I have the power to heal myself.

He asked me if I had fears about being 100% healthy.

I do believe that I can make changes and see improvements. Do I believe that I can be 100% cured of all my ills? Can permanent muscle damage just go away? Osteoarthritis? Plantar fasciitis and heel spurs? Fibromyalgia? Honestly, I think if I will see progress with anything it will be the fibromyalgia--at least with the level of the pain and exhaustion. I have already learned how to lessen the severity with a calmer life, less stress, and not pushing myself--but also needing to move and stretch, too--finding a balance in the activity of my quiet life. When I've been feeling better for a while I get overconfident and believe I can do more--I have paid for that assumption--over and over again. Yet, I still find myself optimistic?!

If it is in my mind, then my mind should be able to control it. It has not worked that way for me. I tried very, very hard to believe that I could make it all go away--for several years while I was desperately trying to stay in college. It didn't work. If I have the ability to just cure myself--then I am a failure. If I just need to believe--then I guess I don't have enough faith.

Maybe I contracted to have this happen to me before I ever came to earth this time? Many things aren't always fixed easily down here. How do we know why we have what we have or why people suffer what they suffer? People suffer and die every day down here. Does that mean they all had the ability to just cure themselves if they really wanted to, if they had enough faith? If we bring illnesses upon ourselves, I accept that. Then I brought this upon myself. And there are reasons--spiritual reasons--for me to be experiencing all of this. I accept that. I am trying to learn all the positive things I can from this experience--from living with daily pain and depleting exhaustion.

What about people like my son--born with severe congenital heart defects? If he had enough faith is he supposed to be able to poof his heart into a normal heart? Where does one draw the line between the possible and the impossible? Or is there one? Maybe not to people like Jesus or God Himself. But to people like me--there are lines as to what I personally can and can't do. Does that mean I have not enough faith or belief? Is my mind and heart too small? Maybe so...

And I thought I have been a believer in miracles--an optimist--all my life? My son is a walking medical miracle. But that doesn't mean he was suddenly made whole with a perfect heart. I guess there's a part of me that resents being told I don't believe enough--just because I am grateful for what I am given in life, don't question why bad things happen, and accept the best that is possible within God's grace or the generosity of a positive Universe. That I do not believe that we are just our bodies--that they are only temporary--and our souls are much more important...

Fears? I spent years looking for a basically one-handed job with no schooling. And that was before all the other physical problems that have arrived since then. I could still stand, walk, climb stairs, sit at a computer all day, and all the rest. If I was suddenly healed--would I be healed of everything? Including that original bad arm? Would I go back to how I felt when I was 40, 30, 20? Would I be cured of only one or two things and not the rest? Anybody in their right mind would want to be healed and whole again! But would I want to go back to struggling to find a job and keep a job again--half healed? No. I'd be crazy to want to go back to that again after a long painful 13 year decline--bankruptcy, losing my car, not being able to support myself, having to quit school, fighting for SSDI...

This is why I don't talk about the health issues much. Focusing on them just makes it worse. It is like when you let yourself think about the pain or the exhaustion--focus on it--it gets magnified. I try to keep my focus off of it and push on, I guess. concentrate on the positives in my life--and there are many!

Why do people think I can heal myself? This very thing came between me and an old friend a few years ago. Who do they think I am?

Sunday-7:45pm

Sun is out and it is 70 degrees! The rains came thru for a couple of days and now it is just beautiful and cooler!! Ahhh!

Watched more of the Sopranos yesterday. They're adding more nasty, sneaky people this second season--hehe!

Have been sick to my stomach at night and am beginning to think it might be the supplements? Not sure. Have been eating with the last set. Maybe I'll try not eating anything with the last ones tonight. They don't seem to bother me much during the day? Maybe a touch of something. Who knows?

Anyways, a gorgeous night! Windows wide and porch open again for reading--ahh!

Saturday 6pm

Everybody needs somebody to love.

Miss attached-at-the-hip Karma gets annoyed when I spend too many sessions at the computer. Probably because she can't fully relax on the back of the gold chair or she'd fall off--hehe! Since I have relented and allowed her up on the desk recently, she's been happier. But she looked so uncomfortable in the cubby hole--so today I rearranged. Moved the wooden drawers/inbox over to the other side and made a reserved-just-for-Miss Karma cubby spot with an old towel.

Now, doesn't she look much more comfortable?

I love you, too, Karma.

Friday-8:30pm

Last night I watched You and Me and Everybody We Know:

Today's world of technology and convenience makes it increasingly difficult to find a real connection with another person. In this compelling look at the everyday human experience, Christine (Miranda July) is a cab driver and artist who leads a solitary life. Richard (John Hawkes) is a recently divorced father who's waiting for great things to happen in his life. When his path crosses with Christine's, he's both entranced and panic-stricken.

The description is much more benign than the actual movie. There are some really disturbing sexual situations with children--most of them only potentially dangerous and nothing horrific resulted, but it was disturbing nonetheless. And there's a scene where Richard deliberately lights his hand on fire with lighter fluid, too! This Christine, who drives an Eldercab, is much more of a borderline (?) mentally ill woman than just an artist leading a solitary life. Very strange movie! Done well and good acting, but not sure I'd recommend it to anybody. John Hawkes is the lead male in the film--he plays the Jewish sidekick of the sheriff in Deadwood (why I rented it of course). Now I am back to The Sopranos season two and have Transamerica with Felicity Huffman to watch (I know she was nominated for an Oscar, but I didn't watch the awards ceremony and don't recall if she won?).

I worked on my website--wrote up how I ended up on disability, changed the intro page (not sure I like it yet, but it is a little bit of an improvement, I guess), and made a link to my eons profile/blog. Boy! Trying to figure out this new program and getting things linked and published--quite a challange! But, I have begun working on the website again--tada! Finally! I am going to work on a list of my interests next, I think? I need a break from the computer, tho. I have been on it a lot for the past several days--emails, eons, my website, and here. Too much. I think I will just pop in here for a couple of days. Got to get something else done around here besides use up all my precious "good" hours at the computer. Not that I am not enjoying myself, obviously, but doing the same thing every day--well, my body protests. So--more tomorrow... :)

Thursday-3am

Yesterday I flattened out the packing paper from the box of supplements to save for recycling and making handmade paper out of later. Karma crawled under and pawed away at holes and tears--had a great time. Cheap cat entertainment!

I started the supplements today. Just getting them all down will increase my water intake-hehe! I will have to start eating something three times a day, too. My! My!

I watched All About My Mother.

An Oscar winner for Best Foreign Language Film, writer-director Pedro Almodovar's compassionate tribute to women examines the life of Manuela (Cecilia Roth), who leaves Madrid for Barcelona shortly after she witnesses her son's accidental death. She reunites with an old friend (Antonia San Juan), a pre-op transsexual prostitute, who introduces her to Rosa (Penelope Cruz), a pregnant nun. Their fast friendship binds them through many struggles.

The transsexuals weren't pre-op, as far as I could tell. There were two persons who were very deliberately bottom half born male and top half constructed female due to breast implants and plastic surgery--but they had no intentions of doing a total switch any time soon. One had been like that for over 18 years and was the father of Manuela's son who died. Don't want to say anything else in case anybody watches it. It was very interesting and was mostly about the bonds and friendships between women--born or wannabes--chuckle! Penelope Cruz looked so young in the film, but it was only made in 1999. How old is she anyways?

I spent most of my time today (after sleeping most of the day away because I went to bed at 6am--I am really on the night shift lately) checking out www.Eons.com. It is soooo new and in need of a lot of tweaking, but I am gradually learning how to navigate the site. I have to take notes to find my way back to places and people. It is nice to find a new website, tho, that is for people over 50. I told my sister and she is checking it out, too! (I find it hard to believe that my baby sister is over 50!)

I am the oldest, born in 1951, in Minneapolis, Minnesota. My brother and sister were both born in 1954--my brother in January and my sister in December. All 100% Swedish, short, a bit stubborn, and near-sighted. My folks are retired in a trailer park in Florida. They come back up to Minnesota for the summer to their trailer in Clearwater. My brother and sister still live in the Twin Cities (Mpls/St. Paul), but I moved up here in 1999 to go to college (never finished due to health decline) and have been here since then. Will most likely be here for some time to come. If I wasn't so sore from being at this computer enough already today, I'd fill in more background for the people who don't already know all about me--it will have to wait till another day. I'll be back! :)

Wednesday-4pm

Leah got the chance to go with her sister and a girlfriend to, I think, a gaming convention in Indianapolis! Like an 11 hour drive, Dagan said. They left at 9am this morning. So, she will be gone until Sunday. I hope they have a safe trip and a great time! We cancelled painting tonight and Dr. John's tomorrow. Dagan works late on Thursdays, so I told him I'd just pass this time. I so rarely miss appointments and don't want to change things around for him at work. After my adjustment on Monday I've felt much better sitting, so Dr. John pounded something back into place--ha!

Closed the apartment up and have the AC on again. It is not really super hot temperature-wise (85), but it is just sticky and thick outside. Supposed to be possibilities of scattered thunderstorms coming thru for the next couple of days, I guess.

I brought my laptop with me to Dagan and Leah's on Monday and left it for him to work on. I think he was going to try to copy the laptop brains onto his computer and then move them again over here or something like that? I am truly confused now about how the spare brain thing works. Dagan came over for lunch today and started the laptop doing something? But, it didn't finish this time either--a box with a red X came up and stopped the procedure. I just called him to leave a message and asked him what to do. (Maybe it is because it is a laptop or because it's a Dell? Dagan says that shouldn't make any difference, but we had no trouble with my desk computer at all?)

I do have my laptop back, tho, and can do morning pages tomorrow! Funny how you get into routines. Even Karma and Gracie are used to my morning routine and having that extra 30-60 minutes before they have to really wake up. I just get coffee, sit on the bed & type, and flip on the weather channel. On a good day I also go thru emails--delete junk mail mostly and read as many others as I can before I get too sore and have to move. We'll be back to the usual morning routine tomorrow--unless Dagan comes after work and confiscates the errant laptop?

Our big box of supplements arrived by UPS this afternoon! But now I can't find my sheet with the amounts and times of day, etc. I had it at Dr. John's--and then we went to Dagan and Leah's. I could have left it at Dagan and Leah's, but I thought I had it in my purse? Just seems I would have put it someplace where I could have found it right away when the box came so I could sort my bottles out of there?? All my life I had been so organized and had such a good memory. This is one of the things that is frustrating about having fibromyalgia--the fibro fog! I hate it! When I am sore and exhausted, especially, I just can't concentrate well. Can't think! Brain doesn't function properly. And my memory is just generally not what it used to be. One of the many health issues that forced me out of college a couple years ago. I guess I could try and call the clinic.....

Okay--I just called. Erica is so sweet! Got all my information I need. I can always ask for another copy of the sheets on Monday if I don't find it. Now I can separate Leah's and my bottles of supplements. She won't be back till Sunday, but I wanted to start mine tomorrow.

Yesterday I watched The Wedding Crashers, The Three Burials of Melquiades Estrada, and Tsotsi. Crashers was pretty lame--tried to be poignant in the end. :(

Three Burials was really different and hard to describe--but I really enjoyed it more than I had expected I would. Here's the description from Netflix:

Tommy Lee Jones stars in and directs this dark comedy set on the Texas-Mexico border. After accidentally killing a man, heartless border patrol officer Mike (Barry Pepper) quickly buries the body in an unmarked grave. But ranch foreman Pete Perkins (Jones) learns of his friend's death, kidnaps Mike and drags him on a harrowing journey to Mexico to bury the man in his hometown. Julio Cesar Cedillo, January Jones and Dwight Yoakam co-star.

Tsotsi was really engrossing for me--teared up a time or two, I tell you! Here's the description from Netflix:

This Oscar-winning Best Foreign Language film shows that no soul is too far gone from being reformed. After shooting a woman and driving off in her car, Tsotsi (Presley Chweneyagae), a ruthless thug, is surprised to discover he isn't alone, kept company by a crying infant in the backseat. He grudgingly takes the child home, and through his efforts to care for the tyke, Tsotsi slowly rediscovers his compassion, self-respect and capacity to love.

I had wondered if I could copy and paste from another source into the blog, but never tried it. It works! tada! But, I cannot copy and paste my very own typed words? Strange. Now I know I can copy the synopsis of any movie I am watching from Netflix! Nice! Gives you a better idea of what I am watching--because I do pick some strange stuff to watch, as Dagan and Leah would say. Not well known movies, I guess. When I do order the well known movies (like the Crashers movie) I am disappointed half the time.

Today I have Me and You and Everyone We Know and All About My Mother to watch. I have the rest of the week and the weekend off! No appointments! As usual I want to sleep, rest, read, watch TV, and paint/craft. I did start another wildflower painting for practice last night, too, BTW. A close up of a sunflower. So, I will probably do a second glazing of the petals pretty soon here, too.

I just thought--I hope they have fixed this so that I have breaks between the paragraphs again? *sigh* Oh well...gotta go.

Tuesday 5:15pm

Caroline was here and cleaned (she comes every two weeks). It is warmer in here today, but I hate to close the windows. It is so windy that it was trying to blow the tablecloth off the table--well, and everything else, too. Happens to be coming my direction today.

Karma and I have been out on the gusty porch all afternoon. I have been reading another book from Duane--about the history of the American Indian Ghost Dance. I needed to change positions again and get up to stretch, so I came in and finally made my first smoothie! I told you I am slow to get to things anymore--I've had the new blender since the 3rd! But last night when I went shopping with Dagan at the grocery store I got yogurt and sherbet and plain soy milk, and having more ingredients combined with it being so warm today(87 degrees) finally got me motivated enough to try the new blender. My first smoothie has blueberries, orange juice, orange sherbet, ice cubes, and plain yogurt--oh and a frozen banana! Really yummy!!! Wow! I can sure see myself getting more fruit down me this way--hehe!

Short and sweet this afternoon. I'm heading back out to read and devour my smoothie! :)

PS Since they worked on this site a couple days ago, now when I post I lose all my paragraph breaks and everything just is smashed together!! Sorry, but it is not me making this difficult to read. And I can't find any way to email them to complain, either? Very annoying!!! Maybe I'll have to start coloring each paragraph a different color if they can't fix this soon. ??

Monday-9:30pm

Here's a picture of Dr. Mike who bought the business from Dr. John.

They are having a little gathering on Thursday, August 17th at 6:30pm to meet Dr. Mike. Perfect for Leah and I because we already go on Thursday nights. We can ask questions and get to know him better. Oh, and they will have little Ceydee there, too! Dr. Mike's been around the office lately--even before they announced he was going to be the new owner.

I didn't write this afternoon because I spent it trying to catch up on a few emails, actually. Then Dagan came and picked me up for my adjustment with Dr. John. And I really needed it this time! All the climbing around I did on Saturday in the kitchen putting away the strange flours and lotus root and such--I must have twisted my butt bones out of whack? It was the first time since I was very first going to Dr. John that I had the sharp, shooting pain in my tailbone when I went to get up after sitting! How quickly one forgets--hehe! Whew! And I had that pain all the time for about three years!! Dr. John hammered on my tailbone and my head (said they were connected--hehe!) and told me I might be sore for a while. Well, I was already sore when I got there--ha!

Dagan and I left and went to SunMart to buy groceries and I could feel it was sore while I was walking, but the walking kind of worked it out, I think. We'll see when I get up after blogging and answering email now tonight--ha! I think it might be gone again, tho. Didn't have it too much over at Dagan and Leah's while we cooked and ate tonight.

Tonight we made Beef with Oyster Sauce and made fresh organic broccoli to have with it. Was really good! Better than the Mandarin Orange Chicken from last week. In fact, Leah didn't like the Mandarin Orange Chicken and Dagan got sick of it after a second helping--so the rest of those leftovers came home with me tonight--chuckle!

Leah and I are going to cook something on Thursday night after Dr. John's, too, this week. So, I can look up another recipe to try. We might swing by the little farmer's market on Main and Broadway, too.

Last night we had our monthly Sacred Circle over at Dagan and Leah's. Jennifer picked me up and dropped me off. Was a very nice meeting! After the talking piece and the burning bowl ceremony, we did the Angelic Messenger Cards and everybody got very appropriate cards for what we wanted to know. We were really connecting, I guess, and the universe was overflowing with guidance! A very positive evening.

I watched Chicken Little this weekend and I thought it was a perfectly awful children's movie! I would have never wanted Dagan to see that when he was little. It had alien mechanical beings (looked like overgrown spiders with red eyes) who were chasing the little animals and zapping things into oblivion (you found out much later that they didn't actually kill and/or destroy the things that they had made vanish with an explosion like effect--they were just held as floating captives inside a space ship?). The aliens were flying down & slicing/mowing parts of the cornfields the animals were trying to hide in--like flying rotating blades! They were going to destroy the earth and kill everybody and everything--so the "oops, we're sorry" ending and we'll put everything back--was just too little, too late. It was way too scary for really little kids, I thought. Or, if people think it wasn't that scary for little kids--well, then that's just way to scary for me!! To think kids wouldn't be scared by such things anymore....

I guess I will go watch Tsotsi, which I never got around to this weekend. :)

Sunday-3pm

Here's Karma in the cubby hole last night. Quite a bit bigger than she used to be, but she managed to fit.

She was a bit cramped, but she stayed there with me. Just glad to be allowed up on the desk.

This morning I caught Karma doing her other little trick that she's too big to do any more--trying to climb up behind the laptop while I am doing morning pages.

Here's the other end. She doesn't quite fit, even when I pull the laptop toward me a couple inches, so she keeps one foot on the bed for security.

Here's my trusty little green cart that I bought when I moved here and now have an elevator! Can haul all kinds of things now! I can't lift much or carry long because of permanent muscle injury to my left arm and tearing the rotor cuff on my good arm a couple of years ago--so this has helped with my being more independent! Love my little green cart!

Today is Sacred Circle over at Dagan and Leah's. Jennifer is picking me up in a couple of hours and dropping me off afterwards.

I really overdid it yesterday because I felt good. Suffering for it today. Oh well. I washed clothes, sliced the meats from the grocery delivery, baked some "healthy" chocolate chip bars (not the sweetest things in the world), and then got started on labeling and storing the entire stack of dry goods I had on the counter! With breaks, I got done at 3am. I did just way too much in one day for me. And I slept terribly--up and down--fitfull sleep. I was even dreaming about trying to sleep and being interrupted and woken up! So, I couldn't sleep here or in my dreams--haha!

So, other than Sacred Circle--doing nothing else today. In fact, I think I might have to take a pain pill to make it thru this evening. Hate to use the few I have left, but pain interferes with my ability to concentrate--and I need to be able to be relaxed and thinking for Sacred Circle. (They are mild pills--low dosage.)

With the changes to my body the past months from getting the adjustments from Dr. John, sometimes I think it has just plain thrown off my ability to judge how far I can push myself. I used to know pretty accurately--from years of trial and error. But now--my body doesn't feel quite the same and the pain moves around to different areas of my back depending on where he is adjusting. I am not as accurate a judge of the after-effects of activity any longer. That is not a bad thing--because I am able to do more than I used to. I just have to learn and adjust to my body's new and changing rules--hehe! And--as usual--I tend to be overly optimisitc!! It will all balance out eventually, I'm sure. And I will end up in a better place, physically, than I was for the last thirteen years--(especially the last three or four). Just takes time. :)

Windows open again! Only 83 degrees today and sunny. Was very cool last night--and supposed to be the same tonight and tomorrow, too. I am off to read on the porch!! :)