Tuesday, August 22, 2006

Tuesday-6:00pm

After Caroline came and cleaned today, I started washing clothes.
I am so grateful to have washer and dryer hook-ups in this apartment. I was able to rent them for not much more than I paid a month anyways in quarters. With my bad arm, it is so nice not to have to haul baskets and laundry soap anymore! They are in this closet in the hallway next to the bathroom and are both humming away over there as I am writing this. :)

I decided to sign up for a couple of writing classes at the Barnes & Noble online university for September. I have taken classes from B&N before and they last about 4-5 weeks. You can just lurk if you want to--read assignments and postings (and there are a ton of people in each class in my experience). Or you can participate and post, if you are so inclined. The classes are free, but you need the book/books. You can follow along at your own pace--but the pace is naturally fast due to the short length of class time.

I had the book already for the fiction writer's class. Not my favorite to actually write, but love to read fiction, so I thought--what the heck, I can lurk! The other class is about memoir writing--right up my alley. I hope my books arrive in time. The classes don't begin until September 4th, I think it was. So, they should have plenty of time to get here. :)

I have just been tired of trying to focus on the health and foods, etc, all summer long--and not seeing much progress beyond what I saw in the first month or so. Haven't seen or felt any differences with the diet change. The supplements have just been making me feel kind of crummy in general. So--time to focus on something else for a while. Don't get me wrong--I am not giving up by any means. Am still going to eat healthier, go to the chiropractor, take the supplements, and so on--just don't want to focus on it because not much is happening and that gets frustrating. I think that's why the "you can heal yourself 100% if you really want to" stuff rubbed me the wrong way for a while. I was already disappointed that I hadn't felt any different. ??? So, I'm going to focus more on the writing classes, painting, my website, and the blogging.

I guess I believe we all go thru things for a reason--to learn spiritual lessons. If we could all just heal ourselves and create miracles any time we wanted to--we'd all be well and never die and be relatives from Nazareth. If we could have enough faith to heal and create miracles, we should be able to eliminate it all! No terrorists, wars, earthquakes, starvation, cruelty, accidents, beatings, killings, catastrophes, or evil of any kind. We'd all be just living in a heaven on earth. If all we had to do is believe it, the intensity of my faith in God and the power of love and goodness when I was a young girl should have created it already back in the 60s! chuckle! :)

Now, maybe we all have this capacity and just don't realize it? Maybe we have to all believe it at once for it to work? Maybe we can all learn to live in peace and harmony? I pray that is true. But--in the meantime--I am just trying to improve my life enough to be able to sit at the computer or paint maybe another hour-session a day and to maintain a positive attitude living with pain and exhaustion 24/7. I am making progress. Small outward steps. Huge inner leaps. :)


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