September 24, 2023 Monday--5am

 Good morning!

If you see it says Monday at 5am you will know that I scheduled a post I wrote on Sunday--LOL!  That worked like a charm!  :)

This last week I stumbled upon and read up on CBT-I (Cognative Behavioral Therapy for Insomnia) and watched videos, too.  Have been trying to adapt my sleep routine to see if it would help.  I set an alarm to take my melatonin and CBD oil and then have no screen time for an hour--do something quiet with the lights down low.  Then when the second alarm goes off I turn off all the lights, listen to something meditative and try to go to sleep.  I was so tired it worked okay for the first couple nights--even if I didn't sleep very long.  The third night, though, I was so very tired that it was a total crash night and I slept 12 hours!  So, of course, then last night I couldn't sleep at all--despite the routine and laying in the dark listening to meditative music for two hours.  Was up all night and only had a nap today from 11:15am till 12:45pm.  So I have no idea when I will sleep again...but I will try the evening routine again--if I am still awake--ROFL!  They suggest writing/journaling, reading a book...just some quiet time.  I'll keep trying.  

Anyways, this felt like a week off in a way.  I have puttered with the cards.  Finished the red bulbs and am about half way done with the silver bulb bases.  

I really thought I would get the coloring done this last week, but I needed more breaks (shoulders and neck sore from all the hunching over--lol!) so I didn't push it.  Took it really easy and mostly just did the usual--laundry and such.  Watched more history videos.  Yup--still down that rabbit hole.  ;)  But I did watch the new season of Only Murder In The Building on Hulu and finished The Chelsea Detective's new season on Acorn TV.  Just was a very relaxing week--albeit not the most productive.

Allie slept at her new spa...

...and on her chair.  :)

Oh, I did put up the last of the new colorful shower curtains.

I think this one is my very favorite!  Saved it for the last of the wild ones.

Although, I do have two more left--a Fall leaves one and a snowy trees one for Winter that I have been saving until it is time, I guess.  Just hanging on to them for the heck of it.  But they are the last ones and I might not be able to wait that long--lol!  Having this awesome deep, richly colored one that looks like rainbow colored clouds will be satisfying, though, for a good long while.  ;)  Just love it!

Allie has taken to lounging around on the table in the bedroom...

...or in her bed I put up there if she wants to spy on the birds in the tree outside the window.  She likes me to put the blinds up just a ways like that so she feels sneaky--lol!

The Saturday before last McFamily got up early to go to the razing of a building in town.  Not something we have happen up here very often.  I thought you might get a kick out of these two short videos.  I sure did.

When the explosion finally did happen without warning Liam bolted to run past Leah!  She grabbed him and held him next to her leg--but both the boys thought it was great!  

Remember Dagan and Leah were over to reorganize my garage back a week or so?  They got all the Valley Con furniture and decorations together on the left side.

I do see my painting easel, though, still leaning against the stacks--lol!

All the IKEA boxes and some more donations got piled on the other side.  After Chuck picks all that up then we can move all the IKEA boxes over in the left hand corner farther away from the door.  I do get a little water sometimes when the snow melts in the winter or if the rain pelts from the right direction.  Not as much now that Gerald put on a new rubber piece along the bottom of the door, but to be on the safe side I want those boxes moved to the back of the garage.

There are so many boxes because each drawer we think has its own box and the living room will be full of IKEA dressers--lol!  One whole wall and another dresser under the window.  :)

Meanwhile, they have been busy, as usual.  The boys are back at the climbing place again now that the summer sports programs are ended.

I think of it as gym time--along with the bowling.  :)

They went to see a lot of big vehicles at some local event.  The neighbor boy came with, too.  Fire truck.

Tractor.

Liam seems to love the huge tires!

Not sure what this is--but they would know.  Looks like it might have a scoop on the front.

Cement truck.

Looks like the boys all had a great time climbing all over and inside of these huge vehicles!  :)

Trent has been by, but since they're working on electric there isn't much to see yet.

Dagan being silly with Blink.

The shower pieces are there now!

My new shower floor!

Leah sends me little drawings sometimes to explain what she is texting me about.  This one was about shelving and where it will go.  Honey oak wood shelves with black brackets.  Looked really nice to me and I agreed with all the places they will go.  :)

Lastly, across the street from them somebody is finally building a house on that empty lot.

They get a good view from upstairs.

Cement being poured for the foundation.  Exciting!

Well, a quiet week for me and Miss Allie.  Lovely fall weather on the whole.  One day we hit 80, I think, but otherwise it has been a lot cooler and even chilly at night.  Had some sweet rain and thunder yesterday off and on.  I do love the sound of rain and thunder!  I miss my sound machine that finally bit the dust quite a while back.  I bet I can get my Hey, Google contraption or Alexa (yes, I have them both) to play me a thunderstorm if I tried.  Might try that tonight.

I'm having my port removed on Tuesday.  Leah is coming with me.  I told her she could drop me off (hate to be a burden) but I didn't fight her when she said--no, I'm coming with you.  (I do love her so much!)  Going to take 5-6 hours.  Call me a wuss, Connie, but they gave me a choice and I'd rather wake up and have it all over with.  I wasn't awake when they put it in and I'd prefer it be the same when they take it out--lol!  Honestly, I'm tired of volunteering for extra pain. I have lived with constant pain and exhaustion for over 20 years with the fibro and arthritis and the rest--and then to have it ratchet way up the past two years with all of this cancer stuff--well, I am just plain sore and tired. Maybe also getting restless for it to be over and done with--even though I know it won't be and I'll have extra visits probably forever--lol!  But you know what I mean.    

Well, Dagan totally agreed with me.  Any time they can put him out for something that is what he chooses, too.  He's been through a lot more than I have, that's for sure.  And now I am much less stressed about having it taken out.  Sit around, get an IV like I do every time I get a CT scan--and wake up later on when it is all done, lay around a little while, and go home.  That's the way I like it.  Out patient surgery is so much easier when you don't have to be awake--lol!  I'll take the pain afterwards.  That's fine.  I am used to that kind of pain--the endurance kind.  ;) 

Plus, my body has been known to over-react.  When I was in my 20s I tried birth control and my body totally believed I was pregnant--no periods, boobs, nausea, stomach, the whole bit.  Couldn't take them.  So then I tried an IUD.  Within a month I was doubled over in pain--totally inflamed--and when the doctor went to remove the IUD, my body had grown actual tissue over and around it--like an oyster would do to sand--and the doctor couldn't believe it--even drug other doctors and nurses in to see it.  So I am always a little leery of what my body may have done to any foreign object.  It looks kind of blue under my skin.  So, I do have some logical reasons to be wondering what it has done being left alone since December when my body hadn't been crazy about it in the first place.  But it hasn't gone berserk or anything over it--lol!  So it might be just absolutely fine.  True.  

Anyways, I should be celebrating I am so lucky a human, right?  Should be feeling so much better by now.  Well, I am--in a more subtle and gradual kind of way.  I truly enjoyed having a week where I didn't need to do much and could just hang out with Allie...do a little of this and a little of that...watch some shows & videos and not feel guilty--lol!  Speaking of--sent back the last of the DVDs from Netflix!  As of Friday they aren't sending out any more.  

My very first rental on 5/9/2005 was Sideways with Paul Giamatti!  I downloaded my DVD history--but I'll never print it off because it was 98 pages!  Rented over 3,060 DVDs in 18 years.  No wonder I can't remember them all--lol!  But what a blessing for this housebound woman!!  Absolutely a godsend!!  The perfect pain escape!  

Yes, it is easier to just stream--if you can find what you are looking for with so many choices--lol!  But I will still miss the red envelopes in the mail just because they have been a part of my life for soooo long.  And you could watch the specials and outtakes and all of those things you can't get when you stream.  End of an era.  Netflix added streaming in 2007.  Such a new idea.  Blockbuster was not happy, that's for sure.  Now there are so many streaming services--it is like when they first came out with cable.  Suddenly sooo many to choose from, but you still have to search to find the good stuff.  I'm trying out a few and when I move I will get rid of the ones I don't watch enough to keep.  :)

Life is good.  And this wussy lady is glad to not be as stressed about Tuesday--lol!  I'm just tired...hurtin'...plan to gradually work on the Christmas cards, take it easy again this week, and try to get my sleep pattern back to my old normal.  I'll keep trying to establish a sleep routine, regardless of whether it is working or not.  It might start to make a difference, right?  Maybe I could end up like Pavlov's sleep-dog if I keep at it--LOL!  Instead of salivating maybe I'll snore--ROFL!  ;)

Been thinking a lot about days gone by.  We had our 55th high school reunion this fall.  Just got a photo of the class members who went.  Where did all that time go so quickly?!  I feel truly blessed I haven't ended up listed as deceased yet.  A close call with a very happy ending!!  One sweet lady from school is taking memoir classes.  She told me a couple other people in class have written books.  How cool is that!  Makes me think about writing a memoir again.  Dagan has told me many times he thought I should take my stories and put them in some kind of order and make a memoir out of them.  They're on my other blog--kind of randomly stored there.  Poems that have been published in literary journals, things I've written in detail on the blog years ago when people wanted to know about parts of my life I had mentioned in passing, all memories.  Some polished--some not.  

The ones that were published were Soft Breaths (four lit mags), God on the Bus, (lit mag), and I Miss My Body Past (first place in a local contest for over 50 yr olds).  Baby Girl won first place in a national contest ($2,000--bought the only Mac laptop I've ever owned).  My fifteen minutes of fame--lol!  Even got interviewed for the local paper in a little paragraph or two and did a local radio live interview.  Anyways, those are the only published ones.  

There are others I wrote for college creative writing classes and poetry classes.  Mommy and That Baby was an assignment to write a first memory, for example.  I wrote a series about Me, GA (my guardian angel), and SC (soulcomfort)--kind of my spiritual life--for my blogger friends who didn't know me well.  And another series called Flowers and Garbage because they asked about that reference from GA.  Goodness!  Been years since I've been back reading in there.  

I started sticking the memory writings and contemplations in that separate blog because people complained they couldn't find them again if they wanted to read them because I started my blog every time like I start my letters--just date, day, and time.  I had moved away from Minneapolis and all my friends and family--and was quite ill--so it was easier to write one letter to all of those who actually had a personal computer back then.  Less letters to write at the time, you know.  That is why I started blogging.  I would try to remember to add big things on the post title once in a while, but I am a creature of habit.  Anyways, they are in the stories blog.

Sorry--rambling and pondering.  Life is just that, isn't it?  A rambling and pondering trip--lo!

I'll let you go--till next week, my friends.  You all mean so much to me.  Even those who have never spoken or just have for the first time recently.  I feel all that positive energy coming to me.  It is so uplifting.  I still believe there is more good in the world and you all are the proof of that goodness and kindness.  Thank you so much!  And backatcha!!!!  :) :) :)