June 16, 2025 Monday--5am

Well, surprise surprise!  This surgery was not what I expected.  Has been no walk in the park, for sure--lol!  For those of you who are squeamish about seeing stitches and such...might as well skip this post.

What used to be just a pink blob has never healed since that young guy took the biopsy chunks.  This was the before picture I took the day of surgery. 

This was the after when I just got home and was still full of Novocain or whatever they used to numb me up...over and over again.

Little did I know they were going to do a skin graft...on skin from my face!?  Those horrible shots...I had a buttload of them!  Thank goodness this chair had arms I could grip!  This lady surgeon told me right off the bat, though, to not hold my breath and to breathe puffs of air through my mouth to help with the pain--kind of like women do in Lamaze.  That did help.  I was bleeding a lot.  Even down my neck.  At one point there were four people in there Leah said.  She was waiting outside the door when they cut the blob off.  Because the surgery lights were so bright they laid something over my eyes to protect them, so I never really saw anything, but they were a crew that worked together like an efficient unit and laughed and chatted the entire time.  Oh, and when she started...I needed more shots because I could feel it on my cheek side and under my nose.  I have the same problem at the dentist because my nerves don't travel the usual pathways, I guess.  

Anyways, they finished removing it, bandaged me up, and Leah could come back in to sit with me while we waited to hear if they got it all.  I was kind of shocky.  Cold, got the shivers, my hands wouldn't stop shaking.  Leah asked the nurse for a blanket for me and that helped.  We waited for a good amount of time to hear if all the microscopic cancer was not at the edges of what she had removed.  If it wasn't all gone then I needed additional scraping and another wait.  Repeat as needed, you know.  I knew I'd need more Novocain because it was already wearing off (which is why I don't think it was the same kind they use at the dentist's).  

They came back and said she had gotten it all!  Leah and I were so excited.  I thought now they'd just throw in a few stitches and I'd be on my way.  Ha!  They sent Leah to the lobby for this one because it would be a good while.  This is when I found out I was having like reconstructive surgery.  Plastic surgery--cutting out a piece of skin and "flipping" it over to cover the hole??  (Couldn't picture it...still can't even when I am looking at it.)  

The surgeon first drew in on my face where the top of my upper lip was and where the crease went down my cheek--the laugh line.  They gave me shots again all around and now down my cheek...felt like half my face.  Lots of Lamaze breathing and gripping of the chair arms again.  Placed the cloth over my eyes and a very long process began.  Once again I could feel things over on the cheek side...more shots.  I thought they were getting done and then she said something about how now they would start the surface stitching or something like that?  Goodness!  

But she seemed to really know what she was doing.  They chatted and laughed most of the time.  I heard her telling the nurse/nurses how much she loved doing surgery.  Said it was because you never knew how things were going to work out when you started.  She loved the challenge of how to put the puzzle pieces together.  They seemed to forget about me and that I was wide awake--lol!  Was nice to hear later when she was done that it had all come together very well.  She said she was glad I had a good space between my laugh line and my lip and had a deep laugh line.  But when they took off the cloth from my eyes, were taking more pictures (they had before, during, and after photos), and the nurse asked me if I wanted to see what it looked like...I said "I'll see it soon enough".  The surgeon leaned over and looked me in the eyes and said..."you won't look the same".

I wasn't sure if she was warning me about how awful the stitches and all was going to look or that I wouldn't recognize myself when it was all healed up--lol!  Very odd.

Anyways, one nurse spent quite a while cleaning up around the wound--even got all the blood down my neck.  She said she'd clean it up the best she could.  They bandaged me up, as above.  Told me I was to leave the bandages on for two days, take seven days of antibiotics, and get the stitches out in ten days.  Liquid diet for two days (but I could have soft foods like yogurt or applesauce) and try not to move my mouth.  They stressed the not moving my mouth several times to let the stitches heal properly.

Three hours and fifteen minutes we were going out the door.

Leah dropped me off and went home to do her magic.  She made me a bunch of little containers of chocolate mousse, vanilla mousse, pudding, and cheesecake filling.  Soft foods.  Comfort foods for those of us with a sweet tooth. ;)

Brought cartons of half and half...

...to use to make protein shakes!  She even brought a couple shakers, too.

Allie has known something is wrong with me...yet again.  She has been on vigil duties.

Keanna came to clean on Tuesday.  It wasn't the first time all I could do is throw on a robe and walk down to let her in--but I probably looked the most jarring to the senses--lol!  I had been slowly bleeding under the bandages and into my mouth in that corner under the bandage until it finally stopped Tuesday evening.

After Keanna left I switched curtains to cheer me up.

I had washed clothes, but never got them hung and put away for days.  Allie didn't mind.  She snoozed on them on the table--lol!

I was unable to eat the soft foods.  I tried.  But I could feel it pulling on the stitches when I opened my mouth far enough for a spoon.  Leah took the beef soup I had leftover in my frig and pureed the heck out of it so I could drink it with a straw.

It was nothing but straws till Wednesday late at night.  (Still actually basically using straws--I think because of those stitches so close to the corner of my mouth--don't want to pull on them.)  Was only able to eat soft foods after Wednesday because Leah brought over some baby spoons she never got rid of--lol!  They work well.  She had come over to be here when I took the bandages off.  

I had bled so much that they seemed surprised during surgery with the down the neck part, there was a whole lot of dabbing by the nurse while the surgeon was working, and they had to stop and do pressure holding several times.  When I read about removing the bandages in the pages of info they sent home with me...well, it said if there was bleeding that wouldn't stop you needed to do pressure for 20 minutes.  Even said to set a timer and not let up on the pressure--repeat if necessary--if still bleeding to go to urgent care.  Suggested to have someone else there who could apply pressure if needed.  So I told Leah about that and she came by after work.  

There wasn't any bleeding, thank goodness.  But man!  So much blood clotting that I couldn't even count the number of stitches.  Just that one above line had around 14, though.  My lip was more swollen as the days went by.  Could hardly close my mouth for the pictures Leah took.

Leah did the gooping and bandaging.  She came by every day through Saturday to rebandage and to also drop something off.  After that I told her I'd take over bandage changing duties.  I could have earlier, but Leah had to bring something by every day anyways and wanted to do it for me.  Am I blessed or what?!

By Thursday I was having a reaction to even the paper tape.  Red rash and even spots that look like blood spots on my cheek.  Leah had a couple other brands of paper tape for me to try.  We already know I react to normal adhesive tapes they use.  I guess I've never had the paper tape on long enough or it was the brand of paper tape?  We'll see.  I'll have the stitches out on Thursday, regardless.  Then I might not need to use tape or maybe only at night?  I hope.

So, it's been just a week of recovery.  All I got done was to finally get all the laundry hung and put away. 

 I haven't had to worry about food.  Leah's goodies aren't gone.  Friday night I couldn't stand not having solid food anymore.  I made a grilled cheese and cut it into little pieces I could chew on one side of my mouth.  Best grilled cheese ever!  I hadn't eaten solid food since Sunday lunchtime the week before.

One last gross recent picture for you.  Hard to see but the inside of my lips on the surgery side are bruised bloody red and my upper lip is still quite swollen.  Ugly bruising turning yellow down my neck.  I am quite the sight!  

Oh, and even showering...I am not supposed to rub on the stitches and they are also to be constantly covered in this Vaseline-type goop...so the blood clots still remain.  Probably will still be there when I get the stitches out. 

But I honestly think when the stitches are out and this has healed up...I don't think it is going to look that bad.  They told me could take maybe a month before it is back close to normal and up to a year before I have all the sensation back...things like that.  Whatever.  One day at a time.  I am glad to have this over with...or close to it.  Just stitches left to get taken out on Thursday.  Maybe I'll get a final count--lol!  And diarrhea to get over from the antibiotics.  Naturally.  You didn't think I'd get by without that side effect--lol!  All that goriness--you're probably not so glad now that I came back--ROFL!

 

So, that was my week.  I am hanging in there.  Sleeping more than usual.  

 

Horrific assassinations and attempts on Minnesotan politicians...my home state,,,where lives my heart.  Was a joy to see how many millions of people were out letting their voices be heard on Saturday!  And especially to see that the Minnesotans came out en masse even after being warned not to protest because the assassin was still on the loose.  Gives me hope!  

May you all have a good week without any surprises--lol!  Thanks for all your well wishes and kindness.  The world needs more of you!!  Till next week...love and hugs from Fargo.  :)